My Other Blog

What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen

Look Out, Germany

I don't mean to brag, but I'm pretty much an expert on the German language. Yep. Two point five years of public high school German right heeere, playah! In fact, I would be saying all this "auf Deutsch," but I don't want to dazzle y'all with my

Anyway, I mention this because today's Wreck is so hilariously horrendous that I may have to lapse into German to adequately describe it.


Here goes:


Gross unpassend fliegend Fekalie-Kuchen!

Wo IST die Toiletin? Fahrvergnügen?
Ich bin ein Berliner!
Schnell! Schnell!


Ahem. Well, I think that gets the point across.

It should be noted that the cake was supposed to read, "Germany, HERE we come!" (Ah, those pesky, hilarity-inducing homonyms.)

Whether the cake was supposed to look like a baked poo souffle with a side of #2 nuggets, however, is anyone's guess. (Although I'm guessing "no.")


Hey, Sarah R., keep it down, will ya?


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Reader Comments (25)

Hört, hört.

March 15, 2018 | Unregistered CommenterFrankN.Stein

I had to run that through Google translate. Thank you that I now know what Fahrvergnügen means. :) Where did you find the word for Calculator? LOL

March 15, 2018 | Unregistered CommenterByrdie

Ach du lieber!!

March 15, 2018 | Unregistered CommenterBetty Martin

For those of you who want to skip the Google translate step, she says:

Big unfitting flying Fekalie cake!

Where is the toiletin? Driving pleasure?
I am a Berliner! Fast! Fast!

Which is a totally fitting reaction to this cake (as always), don't you think?

March 15, 2018 | Unregistered CommenterGreat Disco Newt

.....Just wondering, but (regarding the writing on the cake) I'm quite ...... Hmm. ....
Well, just how loud CAN a cake GET?

March 15, 2018 | Unregistered Commentersendingtheclowns

What did they do? It looks like the cake was snatched from the jaws of hell. All burnt on top. Ewww....

March 15, 2018 | Unregistered CommenterCathy G

OMG! Guten Tag! I leave for Germany in just a little under 2 months. This totally cracked me up and also am sharing it with the people I'm going with. Thanks for making my day. Achtung!

March 15, 2018 | Unregistered CommenterRachel M

Das ist ja wirklich...Scheiße
To keep it in German

March 15, 2018 | Unregistered CommenterBarbara

It makes perfect sense...if it's a farewell cake for the Cookie Monster's upcoming trip to Germany.

March 15, 2018 | Unregistered CommenterJo

99 luftballons!

March 15, 2018 | Unregistered CommenterNena

I thought it looked like a sarlacc about to consume the writing...

March 15, 2018 | Unregistered CommenterGG

Decorated with a ring of seashells and potto chips?

March 15, 2018 | Unregistered CommenterNobodee Home

Wenn ist das Nunstück git und Slotermeyer? Ja! Beiherhund das Oder die Flipperwaldt gersput!

March 15, 2018 | Unregistered Commenterdr handle

Why the seashells? 🤔

March 16, 2018 | Unregistered CommenterKristina

I am dying of laughter both at this cake thing and the translation lol. Oh man what a great laugh.

March 16, 2018 | Unregistered CommenterArlene Marie

My parents were German and I was also born there. In every letter or shopping list they ever wrote (cursive, not printed) the m's and w's looked exactly the same whether they wrote in German or English, it was just a squiggle of peaks and hollows (I was gong to say ups and downs), so if that "cake" was iced by a German baker, then of course it reads "here WE come", that's what I saw right away.

March 16, 2018 | Unregistered Commenterriver

How do you say "I'll have what she's having" in German?

March 16, 2018 | Unregistered CommenterSusan

When I saw this in my RSS feed my first reaction was 'Oh my, that can go wrong on so many levels' and it did not disappoint.

March 16, 2018 | Unregistered CommenterTintifee

@ Great Disco Newt

I got a slightly different translation from Google:

Grossly inappropriately flying cauliflower cake! Calculator!! Where is the toilet? Driving pleasure? I am a Berliner! Fast! Fast!

March 16, 2018 | Unregistered CommenterCali Kath

Another translation I got from Google:

Big inappropriate flying fecal cake! Calculator!! Where is the toilet? Driving pleasure? I am a Berliner! Fast! Fast!

March 16, 2018 | Unregistered CommenterCali Kath

Apparently, in German, FECES and CAULIFLOWER are spelled almost exactly alike.

March 16, 2018 | Unregistered CommenterCali Kath

To you, it looks like a baked poo soufflé. To looks like the puckered brown butthole that a poo soufflé might come from...

March 16, 2018 | Unregistered CommenterOmega7788

Doesn't "Ich bin ein Berliner!" translate as "I am a jelly doughnut!"? I thought "I am a Berliner (person from Berlin)!" would translate as "Ich bin Berliner!" Either way, if Germany can listen in, I don't want to know what the *neighbors* are saying.

March 17, 2018 | Unregistered CommenterJMixx

That W in "we" looks awfully like the M in "come." This changes the meaning slightly for me. No, I do not wish to hear; so please get a room and THEN keep it down, Sarah. Juat sayin'...

March 17, 2018 | Unregistered CommenterSaskfan

That is a lifelike depiction of the mouth of this creature:

March 17, 2018 | Unregistered CommenterHaggish

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