My Other Blog

What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen

The Pink Trim Was a Nice Touch

Heidi wanted a pizza cake, and so asked her local bakery to make one. The encounter went something like this:

Heidi: "Hi, I'd like to order a pizza cake, please."

Baker: "A pizza... cake?"

Heidi: "Yes, you know, a cake that looks like a pizza."

Baker: "I'm not following." Heidi: "It's a round cake, decorated like a pizza... but with icing. Lots of places make them."

Baker: "Still not with you."

Heidi: "No, see, it's really simple: it's just a single layer cake, but with icing toppings and sauce and stuff to make it look like a pizza. A pizza cake."

Baker: "Huh. Well, I guess I can make that. But you better bring in a reference photo."

Heidi: "Of a pizza cake?"

Baker: "No, of just the pizza. So I know what kind you want it to look like."

Heidi: "Oh. Well, it can just be a plain cheese pizza, but... sure?"





And for those of you who like to peer down the road not traveled:




Maybe you dodged a bullet, there, Heidi. Thanks to Heidi L., Greg, Leah R., & Kris D. for proving wrecking baked goods is a pizza cake.


Thank you for using our Amazon links to shop! USA, UK, Canada.

« Friday Favs 3/24 | Main | Completely Inappropriate First Birthday Cakes »

Reader Comments (31)

Thanks for the hearty WHAT THE HECK this morning. I'm not going to even attempt to decipher that black and gold . . . thing.

March 23, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterMoira

I honestly can't tell which is a worst cake. None of those look passable....

March 23, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterNathan R.

Foil-wrapped coins as pepperoni, sheesh!
Heidi should have given up when she got so little understanding from the baker. She had a clear warning that the end result would probably NOT live up to expectations.

March 23, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterAlison in Indiana

Well, the first cake is really nice! Pretty!
It's just too bad that someone set a pizza on top of it. ... you know? There's not really much room to decorate it, now... and if they try to pull the pizza off? Oh, my! That would pull the frosting off like scalping a ...uh...something that gets scalped. O.o? Oh, got it!

March 23, 2017 | Unregistered Commentersendingtheclowns

*Snort* HA HA HA HA HAAAA! "... a pizza cake"... Jen and John hoJ you guys slay me!

Wow... I didn't know about pizza cakes, but I didn't know about 'galaxy' cakes either until I read about it in the most current Food Network mag. I'm totally out of touch!

Too funny and those pizza cakes are great objects of Wreckiness - especially the one with the candy coins masquerading as pepperoni!

Ciao baby!


March 23, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterMaryO1230

Hey, the one with (what I hope is) chocolate coins looks great. I would totally order that if I wanted a pizza cake and there was one like that on a counter or something

March 23, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterFrancisco

#3 looks like it has potato chips on top. If they don't have any particular flavor other than "salt", that might not be that bad, flavor-wise. The foil on the chocolate coins, however....

March 23, 2017 | Unregistered Commenter3Davideo

Yellow squiggle worms,
pepperoni coins or "poop"-
paper might be best.

Or they just all stink. Yeah, we'll go with that.

March 23, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterBossyHeifer

Bad idea in the first place. A convincing pizza facsimile would set your taste buds wrong. I'll give the third cake credit for cleverness in using red-wrapped gelt for pepperoni.

March 23, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterClassic Steve

I thought those were potato chips, but then I noticed they have dew droplets, or condensation or...something wet. So it's what? Shaved cheese? Tell me that's not shaved cheese.

March 23, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterDegera

Not sure if she got the better or worse cake. O_o

March 23, 2017 | Unregistered Commentermindy1

When a cake hits your eye like a big pizza pie
That's a Cake Wreck
When the pep'roni shines like some foil wrapped dimes
That's a Cake Wreck
Cheese that's made from some silly string, looks like silly string
Makes you say, "What the hell-a"
Sausage poop, looks like messy goop
Not so swell-a

When your pizza cake's cruel 'cause your baker's a fool
That's a Cake Wreck
When you run from the shop with a box full of slop
Please don't pay
When you walk in a dream but it's really a nightmare signore
Scuzza me, but you see, even wrecks aren't free
That's a Cake Wreck

March 23, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterSuBee

Is that an actual pizza on cake #1 or is it just an edible picture of a pizza? Please tell me it is a picture. That might be white chocolate curls on cake #3, although I don't know why someone would use these on a "pizza" cake.

March 23, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterD'Marie

Those are not potato chips, it's shaved white chocolate. Adding the foil wrapped chocolate coins, okay, two kinds of chocolate on top, the better. But what are those tiny black plops among the white chocolate shavings? Did the bakery have a rodent problem and those are it's calling card? Ewwwwe. No thanks.

March 23, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterCookiemama

As a vegetarian, if I had to eat a pepperoni pizza I'd much rather have red foil chocolate coins masquerading as pepperoni than giant blobs of chocolate poo!

March 23, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterJansville

When Heidi said "lots of baker's make them", the light bulb should have gone off and she should have called one of those other bakers.

March 23, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterALLEGRA

#2 cake (heh), I mistook for lava coursing across the shores of Hawaii.
It does look like the "pizza" was horribly burned and then squirted with mustard.

March 23, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterDeb in atlanta

what i'm learning from this site is that if you have to do too much explaining to the baker, best just forget the whole thing.

March 23, 2017 | Unregistered Commentersteph

Silly String explosion!!!

March 23, 2017 | Unregistered Commenterccrow

@SuBee: Awesome!
(Now I want to watch Moonstruck!) =^~.~^=

March 23, 2017 | Unregistered Commentersendingtheclowns

I'm with you, Cookiemama. Shaved chocolate and (sure, foil-wrapped) chocolate coins? Not a deal-breaker. Could be good, and points for cleverness for the shaved chocolate to look like cheese. But what are those black things?

March 23, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterKogarashi

Nah, the way you make a pizza cake is to bake it in a giant pan pizza dish, so you get a cake that's about 2" deep, Chicago-style. Mix up your buttercream (don't forget to add yellow to the red to get *real* red) for the sauce, flatten red gumdrops for pepperoni, dice white and green gumdrops for onions and peppers, and use chocolate chips for sausage. White buttercream, thinner, with just a touch of yellow for the mozza drizzled over the top, and you have a sugarbomb of a pizza cake that your kid will go bananas over and that the adults will pick the candy off of to eat. But it looks amazing! (I got some practice at this because for several years running, this was what my daughter wanted for her bday.)

March 23, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterWendy

You keep using that word. I do not think it means what you think it means.

March 23, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterSamsmom

Yet another thing not to ask the local baker to make.

March 23, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterKyle

Funny, I just ordered pizza...wonder if it will show up resembling cake.

March 23, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterJ'NaeNae

That last one is an Ulcerative Colitis Cake. Just sayin'.

March 23, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterBADKarma

Oh man. I hope Heidi didn't buy that cake. Though it sort of looked nice until they plopped edible pizza picture on top..compared to ones that look like they had burnt poop on em this one wasn't so horrible lol.

March 24, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterArlene Marie

Maybe the black things among the shaved white chocolate shavings are supposed to be mushrooms.

March 24, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterAlison in Indiana

So, I knew about cutting circles from Fruit Roll-ups or such instead of those chocolate coins for pepperoni, but not having seen Wendy's response, I couldn't remember what was common for the other toppings, so I googled "pizza cake." Do you know that the top results are not cakes that look like pizzas, but the reverse? As in pizzas stacked one upon the other to make a cake! I think I'd rather have one of these cakes, ugly as they are, instead. If I'm going to cram my arteries full of fat till they can't take it any more, I'd rather it be sweet fat!

And I'm pretty sure the black things are raisins. (Ptui!)

March 30, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterStephanieJ

Well that wasn't a PIZZA cake for that baker!

March 31, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterLuna

man i wish i knew that was a thing. my son asked for a pizza cake last year. i would totally upload the pics if i could. i made 2 and they looked faboosh.

April 7, 2017 | Unregistered Commenterkate

PostPost a New Comment

Enter your information below to add a new comment.
Author Email (optional):
Author URL (optional):
Some HTML allowed: <a href="" title=""> <abbr title=""> <acronym title=""> <b> <blockquote cite=""> <code> <em> <i> <strike> <strong>