My Other Blog

What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen

Against The Grain


...maybe the bride shouldn't have ordered a whole wheat wedding cake.


Thanks to Sasha M., for helping us remember the first year is always the harvest hardest.




Update From Jen: 


I see your stalks of wheat, Sharyn, and raise you...



Thanks to Robert V. for making like a tree, and swaying in high winds.

(I'd ask you readers who won, but considering these were both wedding cakes, I guess we already know who lost. Heh.)



Update from john (the hubby of Jen) 


Ooh, ooh! My turn!

Sha-POW! Take THAT! Haha!


Thanks to Adrienne H.  for helping me needle my fellow writers. I'm pretty sure I sapped their strength. Also, my house is a bit messy so I should probably spruce up the place!

Three! THREE PUNS!!! AH. AH. AH!


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Reader Comments (19)

I'm sorry to do this to you Sharyn, but I think that wheat cake is kinda cool. The other two, not so much. If the loser is the winner, then john (thoj) has my vote. Wait, I didn't mean it like that! if the losing CAKE is the winner. That's what I meant all along, I promise. We love you john (thoj)!

November 1, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterAngelaS

You could probably get a grain free bite from the bottom tier of that first cake, and the flowered branch looks easy to remove, but that last cake has been rendered completely inedible. Wish we had photos of them trying to cut the cake!

November 1, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterHeather

I was going to say initially that the first cake must have been for Don King's wedding. But as I perused the entries for today, I noticed that john, (the hubby of Jen), was gloating over his three puns. Tsk, tsk, tsk! You should never gloat about puns in the presence of a chief punster. With that in mind...

This first cake barley qualifies as a wedding cake. The baker oat to be ashamed. I'm surprised the bride and groom didn't pop him in the mouth and give him a sorghum. (Of course, I say that with a rye smile). Let me go back and make sure I've spelt everything correctly.

The second cake. Well, Jen, it just seems like you tried to branch out, but just went out on a limb. Does this stem from some innate need to outdo your team members? You should just leaf it alone. Even the pets will turn up their noses at this cake - I know the dogwood.

Finally, the last one. Look over there. Cedar cake? I cone not believe it's so ugly. It won't leave yew pining fir more. (Ahem, john, that's three in one line). Maybe now I'll have left you stumped.

But back to the first cake. For some reason, it reminded me of the Little Rascals, which reminded me of this gem. Buckwheat of the Little Rascals became a Muslim. He changed his name to...

Kareem of Wheat!

November 1, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterMike

That's not even actually wheat.

November 1, 2017 | Unregistered Commenterlokispeaks

We'll, THAT one's not gluten-free!

November 1, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterSeabird

First one's kind of nice, actually.

November 1, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterLee

The plant material on the first cake isn't wheat -- it looks like grass gone to seed.

November 1, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterDee, just Dee

Does anyone "else" see Bartholomew JoJo Simpson in that first sheaf of wheat?

November 1, 2017 | Unregistered Commentersendingtheclowns

They are all ridiculous, but the wheat cake reminds me a little too much of old-school Mort from the Bazooka Joe bubble gum wrappers.

November 1, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterTerri

Mike, as a lover of puns, I bow to you (and bough to you). In comparison, John's post was almost wooden. But you went right to the root of the matter. You've left us all pining for more.

November 1, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterPertigal

While the puns for the last cake are quippy and clever...that's not pine...nor is it any type of tree, it is leather leaf fern. The kind used in bouquets and floral arrangements...granted, it's dried up and desiccated and looks like it's been sitting in the sun for seven hours...but it is fern.

Have to agree with a couple other posters on the first one...NOT wheat, it is either a strain of pampass grass, canary reed grass or a type of feather grass.

I love all the puns "punnishment" reading today's post. Yeah, I KNOW, I will stick to the botanical identification.

LOVE to you all for making me smile daily!

November 1, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterVa Beach alemaP

Better watch out! My daughter wanted something different to carry at her wedding, and learned that it was once customary in some places to carry a sheaf of grain, representing fertility. So she got some, and the girls had a small gathering on the day before the wedding where each made her own "bouquet". Interestingly, she and her cousin, against all family history, each later bore twins (in addition to previous children they already had). One of the other attendants has also now had an accidental child, with another - also accidental - on the way.

November 1, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterSandra

Bravo Mike!

November 1, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterHeather

The grass on the first cake looks quite pretty, provided you don't mind not eating that half of the cake. However, the top tier isn't centred on the lower one, and the icing on the lower one isn't smooth. This is a wreck, folks.

November 2, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterMorag

While you flounder on this post, I carrot promised not to beet you. You may whisk to knife me now.

November 2, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterSam

Oh man these are making me laugh especially the first one. How anyone thought that was a great decorating idea I don't know but I am sure the bride didn't lol.

November 3, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterArlene Marie

The blue flowers on the last cake look very much like delphinium. "All parts of these plants are considered toxic to humans, especially the younger parts, causing severe digestive discomfort if ingested, and skin irritation."/wikipedia So not only ugly, but truly inedible.

November 3, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterAnita

OMG, the first one is featured by Martha Stewart!

November 5, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterChris Staffa

I really like the first one - I was waiting to see the wreck version right after it! It's a bit lopsided I could happily have it. Yes, you'd pick the wheat off, but the line is nice.

November 19, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterKiwiCath

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