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What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen

Great Expectations

I know we all love wedding wrecks with a schadenfreude-filled passion, but when it comes to what-they-wanted vs. what-they-got wrecks, believe me, it's not just wedding cakes:


You know those days when you wonder why you even bothered showing up for work? 

That's the top tier on the right.


 Ammi T. hoped to find a friend in her baker when she ordered this Toy Story-inspired Woody cake:

But instead she went to fecality, and beyond:


It's like two poop ropes shaking hands.

In fact, I think we're going to need a rear view on this one, don't you? [nodding] Yeah.

Turn 'er around, boys!


Hoo-WHEE! Saggy.


 Now, to be fair, I'm not sure how anyone would go about recreating this next cake exactly:

 (What is that, printable fondant? It sure doesn't look like paper...)

 But regardless, this isn't it:


That moment when you realize the awful Pooh picnic wreck is an engagement cake.


And finally, Virginia K. wanted this shaped number cake for her eighteenth birthday:


 But instead, she celebrated her legal coming of age - and all its unlimited litigation possibilities - with this:

So many things to say, but I keep coming back to those color choices. "Ok, you know what I'm thinking? I'm thinking EARTHWORMS and MINT ICE CREAM. Can we make that happen? Yes? AWESOME."


Thanks to Rebecca, Ammi T., Anony M., &Virginia K. for that horrifying mental image. I mean, sure, I wrote it, but still. I BLAME YOU.


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« Prepare for ALL the "Horny" Jokes | Main | The Winter Blues... And Reds? »

Reader Comments (27)

… So, which one received the single "congratulation"; Tim or Natasha?

January 11, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterShirley

Aside from the "unicorn horn", that horse cake isn't too bad, but the rest? Wow. Just wow.

First off, you DO NOT try to recreate in buttercream what was done in fondant. That Woody cake is just plain pathetic, and the engagement cake is no better. When I showed The Squire the 18th birthday cake, he remarked "That's just simple numbers", and then burst out laughing when I scrolled down to the Wreck.

January 11, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterLady Anne

After all these years you'd think I would have learned by now not to be eating or drinking when I come here. But the colors on that last cake make me not want to eat, ever again.

January 11, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterDegera

Schadenfreude wrecked kiddie birthday cakes! The younger the kids are, the funnier it gets! XD

January 11, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterEsme

Yet more proof that 'Yes, we can do that in buttercream' is lie!

January 11, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterDiddleymaz

Ahh, "What I Ordered/ What I Got." A metaphor for so much that is going on in the world today. I guess I'll just have to learn to embrace earthworms and mint ice cream.

January 11, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterSuBee

OMG. Laughing sooooooooooo hard.... especially at the "earthworms and mint ice cream" comment. You guys... WHAT a mental image. Too too funny!

January 11, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterMaryO1230

LOL at two poop ropes shaking hands!

January 11, 2017 | Unregistered Commentermindy2

@ SuBee,

So very true. Love the comment! Maybe a poem/limerick is forthcoming? :-) meo

January 11, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterMaryO1230

With that Woody Cake, Sonny & Cher came to mind. Ahem:
"She said I want a Woody cake,
"She asked 'Can you?'
"They said, yes we can make"

"Well she just knew, might not be true, But said "Ok, I give the job to you"
duh da da duh da da duh da da..
"Blob. (duh da da duh da da duh da da duh da da) I got Pooh Blobs'
(duh da da, duh da da, duh da da, duh)
"I got Pooh Blobs"
(duh da da, duh da da, duh da da, duh)

January 11, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterCookiemama

That last one, more like moldy know what? NEVERMIND.

January 11, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterJ'NaeNae

That last cake -- ewwwwwwwwww!

January 11, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterKelly

"Ugly little spud isn't he?"
"I think he can hear you Ray."

That was the first thing that came to my mind from the quote.

January 11, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterNathan R.

Not printable fondant. Its an edible image, printed on a sugar sheet or water paper. Cut it out, stick it on with water. The lazy-man's decorations.

January 11, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterRozz

I am genuinely curious if some wrecks occur because the customer tells their baker, "I want [example cake], but made with buttercream instead of fondant" and the baker is too inexperienced or unwilling to say "Nope, not gonna work." A lot of these wrecks are fondant to buttercream or other frosting type cakes.

January 11, 2017 | Unregistered Commenterhexcellent47

You could put what I know about baking and decorating cakes in a 1/8 teaspoon (though I am EXCELLENT at eating cake), but for the life of me, I look at some of these and think, "Was the baker too cheap to go out and at least get the proper size cake pan?"

January 11, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterBarbara

If someone made me one of these cakes I'd be stoked! No doubt it took them a long time. However if I paid for them from a "professional " it would be completely different!

January 11, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterGina

The original of the picnic cake may be the work of a flatbed printer I saw a photo printed directly on a cake with a specialized version once.

January 11, 2017 | Unregistered Commentergonnhirrin

Haha - and the congratulation may actually be to "Nataska."

January 11, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterHAL

I started doing calligraphy when I was in High School. The absolutely hardest thing to learn was how to do clean, pretty, effective filigree. If there is one lesson in my life that Cake Wrecks has reinforced it is that lesson I learned in High School.

January 11, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterBeth C.

I totally understand that buttercream will give a very different effect than fondant. But GEEZ! What happened to the Woody cake? Is that even buttercream? It has such a weird, almost gritty look to it.

January 11, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterBluebonnet

The "wanted" horse-head cake would look good in someone's bed. Just sayin'.

January 11, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterBADKarma

What happened to Woody's hat?

January 11, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterNobodee Home

i was actually expecting worse (well...different) results for a woody cake. this one may not be clean, but it's safe for the kiddies.

January 12, 2017 | Unregistered Commenternomi

In that first baby shower cake, the "wanted" cake is pretty poorly executed as well :/ Maybe it's like making a copy of a copy of a copy, it just degrades more and more each time it's reproduced.

January 12, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterNaivohw

Oh man these.. there are no words for these things other than the fact I nearly spit soda on the screen laughing at them. Luckily I had finished it before I saw these.. lol

January 13, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterArlene Marie

Is it just me or are there a lot of bakers who don't know how to do pretty swirls, so they just resort to odd curly-ended C's instead?

January 16, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterKogarashi

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