My Other Blog

What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen

How It Might Have Happened

"Hello? Yes, I'd like to order a cake that looks like my husband's Audi. That's right, an Audi. And could you make it a nice coppery brown? Thanks!"


[Later that day]






Alisha E., don't tell me that's not really what happened, because I choose to believe it is. So there.


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Reader Comments (30)

I think my favorite part is the bow tie - he has no neck! How can you wear a bow tie when you have no neck??

July 13, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterKimS

At least the baker chose to not make the "outie" further south!

July 13, 2016 | Unregistered Commentermiss paper

Ahhh. A formal, black tie occasion. So appropriate for a party,

Before anyone thinks to ask WHY
He's dressed in BVDs and Black Tie
With little black hearts
Over the manly parts,
Just pause for a chorus of "Oh, my!"

July 13, 2016 | Unregistered Commenterdrgns4vr

Please tell me it took you a while to come up with that one. Please?
Otherwise, I will be entirely disappointed that my stupid brain is not capable of making such punny connections between torso cakes and cars. ;-)
However, I'm happy that yours does due to the levels of enjoyment it procures us. :-)

July 13, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterNonny

That looks nothing like a car. Are you sure you didn't mix two blogs here?

July 13, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterNancy

The baker didn't have time to make the whole car...that's just the trunk....

July 13, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterThe Midnight Writer

I'm about 99% sure you already used that joke. But it is funny.

July 13, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterJosh

I really, really REALLY like the over-medium eggs in the upper region.
How do you cut and serve the boxers without falling out and rolling on the floor? And how could you NOT run your finger down the knife and pop a big ol' blob of man frosting between your trembling lips?
That is one ugly cake.

July 13, 2016 | Unregistered Commenters.marie

@ Nancy - Audi = Outie (Bellybutton) :)

@drgns4ver - Is it weird that I read that in George Takei's voice? Oh, my!!

July 13, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterKimS

I thought they got it "Audi" mixed up with "body."

July 13, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterQue Sara Lee

@KimS - I hadn't been thinking George Takei's voice, but it'd be icing on the cake if he did it.

July 13, 2016 | Unregistered Commenterdrgns4vr

Love it @drgns4ever!

And Miss Paper, I'm with you!

July 13, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterJodi

You say "po-TAY-toe", and I say "po-TAH-toe"; you say "toe-MAY-toe", and I say "toe- MAH-toe"...blahblahblah--LET'S call the wHOLE THING OFF!!
=^-.-^= (Please!)

July 13, 2016 | Unregistered Commentersendingtheclowns

Hilarious!!! Love this - OUTTIE bellybutton vs. AUDI car...coppery brown bellybutton!! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH (big breath) HAHAHAHAHAAHA

Cakewrecks, you guys kill me!!! Love you sooooo much!

(Okay, gotta play Devil's Advocate here...given the different styles of communication - who the heck orders a car-shaped cake by make without a photo or at least stating it's a car??? I'm no dummy, but if someone asked me to make an Audi, I'm sure I'd probably come up with something just as cringeworthy. Just saying....)

July 13, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterNutmeg

They wanted a cake that looks like a car. Instead, they got one that looks like a...carcass!

July 13, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterRainbow

@The Midnight Writer: Haha! That's just as well, I guess! They didn't have to bother with a glove compartment, either...=^-.-^=

July 13, 2016 | Unregistered Commentersendingtheclowns

Am I the only one wondering what occasion spurred someone to order this cake? I can't think of any event in my life that would have called for a semi-nude man torso with a bad spray tan, bowtie and heart panties - thank goodness!

July 13, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterBluebonnet

Am I the only one who saw pieces of bologna for the chest region? It would go with the snippet of weinie used for the Audi.

OMG! I just made it worse!

July 13, 2016 | Unregistered Commenterladypatg

Midnight writer nailed it!!!!! Just the trunk! Laughing too hard to function!

July 13, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterAlex

@Josh - on Wednesdays they do Wrecky Replays, where they take older posts from the depths of the internet and re-post them so everyone who follows and doesn't have time to go through the archives can enjoy. :) If you keep an eye on the tags, it'll tell you when it's a replay.

July 13, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterScaperMama

Hermia is getting *really* tired of the puns her work-mates come through with.

July 13, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterMillieP

Am I the only one who's thinking that if somebody pulls that cork out, the whole thing will deflate with a terribly amusing 'thrrrrrrrrrrrrrrp' noise? Anybody else? No? Okaaaaay, it's just me then.

As to how a man with no neck can wear a tie, it's definitely possible - just watch a rugby awards night some time, there's lots of men without necks and they manage to wear ties somehow.

July 13, 2016 | Unregistered Commenterdrhandle

she should have put a twinkie under his briefs.

July 13, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterBarb at Caz

Fortunately, the squashed spotted pancakes topped with one sundried cherry tomato apiece are quite appealing.

July 13, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterTeresa from Oregon

That looks more like a leaky, slightly misplaced ostomy that an outie........or an Audi! Yeccch!

July 14, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterCherylG41

I'm a little concerned about the blue dye leaking out from under the edges of the leg openings in the undies.

July 14, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterMorgana

@Morgana It isn't is leprosy.

Hey now, buddy, don't you give me no lip
Sorry I was using your head for dip
There's a guy in the hot tub, I don't know who
Wait a minute, it looks like Stu

Well, hold the phone now, what do I see?
Another pretty mama got her eye on me
At the party at the leper colony
Oh, there's a party at the leper colony

July 14, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterMedith

Thanks @ScaperMama the tag actually wasn't there at the time of comment. I was really tired yesterday and forgot all about Wrecky Replays XD SORRY EVERYONE

July 14, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterJosh

Oh man that bow tie looks like a bat lmao. A bat and a torso what a perfect match.

July 15, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterArlene Marie

Aah. Needed to say "Audi" with an American accent for me to get this!

July 17, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterKathy Hirst

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