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What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen

Wrecky Exhibitionists

Sometimes I think of wrecks not as really, really bad cakes, but really, really bad art.

And to make them seem more arty (and to amuse myself, because let's be honest, that's a priority) I'll give them hoity-toity art names, like:


"Blanket Of White Silence, Being Loudly Smothered"


"Lobster Steroids."


"Two Young Black Birds Mustache You A Question"


"Ode To An Airbrush Tip That Wasn't Screwed On Tight"


"High Five, Velveeta!"


"An Early Midsummer's Morn Shattered By A Bird Puking"


And lastly:
"Easter Bunny, Deconstructed"

I hope this brings you a whole new appreciation for your local wreckerARTers, minions.


Thanks to Jennifer V., Anne L., Stephanie B., De C., Michael R., Samantha S., & Stephanie G. for helping these wrecks look even more sketchy.


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Reader Comments (52)

Excellent, Jen. My fave was the one about the airbrush tip.

June 14, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterMaureen S

I like the way the first work of art labeled each guest's portion of cake. It does away with all that arguing over who gets an end piece or who gets a flower. Well done, artiste.

Also, I like the little tomalley cupcake next to, yet clearly separate from the lobster representing how, though the lobster is physically strong, he has lost his essence, his soul, indeed, his very liver. It's really quite striking

June 14, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterSuBee


June 14, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterFrankN.Stein

My husband said the "Velveeta" cake was an upside down boot. And then began singing, "What's it all aboot, Alfie". I must love him; I haven't killed him.

June 14, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterLady Anne

Ah such arty goodness first thing in the morning -- I feel properly edified!

What the heck is the Velveeta high five one actually supposed to be?! I puzzled over it for quite awhile and, other than a volcano coming out of the ocean, I got nuttin'. What is the Velveeta part?

An Early Midsummer's Morn Shattered by a Bird Puking has made my day. Nuff said.

June 14, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterJodi

When you put it that way, I realize that yes, many Wrecks are better than some of the stuff I've seen in modern art museums. Maybe the Wreckorators just need a new job.

June 14, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterElisabeth

Does "Ode To An Airbrush Tip That Wasn't Screwed On Tight" remind anyone else of a cave painting cake gone awry or is it just my anthropology major kicking in?

June 14, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterJanna

A critique for the first piece:

While it's difficult to enter into this work because of how the mechanical mark-making of the figurative-narrative line-space matrix spatially undermines the substructure of critical thinking, the internal dynamic chaos brings inherent overspecificity within the realm of discourse.

June 14, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterDeb

With regard to the issue of content in "Easter Bunny, Deconstructed", the disjunctive perturbation of the Lagomorpha facture contextualize further exploration of the metaphorical Bugs Bunny resonance.

June 14, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterA. Critiq

I think the cookie cake one is just upside down. I think it's supposed to be a glass on a napkin.

June 14, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterErica

The lobster one had a touch of cuteness. But the airbrush one: I'm giggling with visions of out-of-control hoses. . . .

June 14, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterTLC

If Jackson Pollock was a cake decorator . . .

June 14, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterKimS

I'm also confused by the Velveeta cake. An odd mountain with snow on the bottom, in front of a sunny sky stars in it? An...axe? A high school graduations cap for a school with orange and blue as their colors?

I need to know!

June 14, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterKelly W

High Five Velveeta cookie to me looks like an attempt at a Graduation Cap and the ugly fat blue tassel. Velveeta was not the only thing HIGH apparently.

June 14, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterCookiemama

I think the velveeta is an upside down BEER glass.

June 14, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterEmily

Ooooh, they did deformed rabbit! That's my favourite!!!

June 14, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterUte

I believe the Velveeta cake is upside down. It's a boot stomping out Velveeta because, well it's not food and SHOULD be stomped out! I think you rushed to judgement on the "air brush cake". Obviously, it is a Picasso of dinosaur bones. It is truly a master work that should be hanging on a wall...or thrown up against one. You decide!

June 14, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterLisa

I think the velveta one is a graduation cap. That is my guess, anyway.

June 14, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterKrystine

I'm so torn on the first one. On one hand, there's a lot of random floatsam and sprinkles. On the other hand, when a customer asks for 22 names on a cake... there's only so much that can be done.

Still trying to figure out velveeta. It looks better upside down, like an empty parfait glass on a table. But that makes about as much sense as velveeta.

June 14, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterUmmy

@Janna, I agree. My thought was "prehistoric cave dweller painting by someone with no artistic talent". Or one of those people who thinks more is better.

As for the last one, I see an overworked decorator losing it and saying, "You want a rabbit? Well here is your stinkin' rabbit!"

June 14, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterTriciaL

I think the first cake is from an AA or NA type meeting where they celebrate the months and years of sobriety with a cake. Most smaller meetings have a designated baker, amateur, that make these, so results not too professional.

June 14, 2016 | Unregistered Commenterkaren

I think the velveeta one is either a volcano or an oddly colored graduation cap. Those are my best guesses. Or maybe the Erlenmeyer flask used in the original research that led to the creation of the velveeta formula!

June 14, 2016 | Unregistered Commenterboots

Ya know if you snuck in and put these cakes in a modern art museum I bet some people would think they were exhibits... :P

June 14, 2016 | Unregistered Commentermindy1

I thought the Velveeta one might be related to Diary of a Wimpy Kid and the dreaded "cheese touch".

June 14, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterChrmow

<slow clap>

June 14, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterMelanie

Would velveta be a windmill? Well that's what i'm goin' with!

June 14, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterWannek

The green cupcake, on its side in with the Lobstinator is blowing my mind! What is it? What does it mean? Is it representative of the youth and ability to scratch his back, that he gave up when he turned to the Roids? Is it accidental art? Like "whoops, didn't see that random green cupcake, and now I've put the lid on, so I guess it has to stay"? Or is it a bonus ugly cupcake that is in there on its side, maybe that's what makes it special for the birthday boy or girl lucky enough to get a Lobster CCC *patooie*?
Never mind the "Cheese" cookie/cake, I must know the inspiration behind the mysterious green cupcake!!!

June 14, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterCBushLite

Ute, I think I love you :)

'Roid Lobster is so happy because he hasn't had the dreaded " my nuts have disappeared!" side effect from using steroids. Yet. Also, he has a cupcake. Since he's finished his competition he can eat the cupcake. Lobsters eat cupcakes, right?

After looking at Loose Nozzle Cake I just want to know what the wreckerator looks like. And the room. And how long it took to clean up. Assuming that they did clean up, that is. *giggles imagining a wrecked wreckerator*

June 14, 2016 | Unregistered Commenterladypatg

The cupcake with the green icing next to the lobster represents that green intestinal slime that some people claim is the most delicious part of the lobster and the rest of us know is completely disgusting.

June 14, 2016 | Unregistered Commenterlmr

Chrmow, the cheese touch was the first thing that popped into my head!

June 14, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterKelly

I also think the velveeta one is upside down. Some sort of beverage on napkins or perhaps playing cards. Still pretty wrecky even if that' the case though.

June 14, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterErin

Don't you think Velveeta is the Donald Trump of the pre-packaged cheese-food world?
It's artificial, it's bad for you and it's orange, yet people buy into it. Maybe the Velveeta cake is some sort of campaign cake - Notice the little Trump wigs circling the perimeter.

June 14, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterHill

Baker making Cake #2: Why not Zoidberg?

June 14, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterS.B.

The pink goo is likely an outtake from the Wizard of Oz... "You cursed brat! Look what you've done! I'm melting! melting! Oh, what a world! What a world! Who would have thought a good little girl like you could destroy my beautiful [pink] wickedness? Oooooh, look out! I'm going! Oooooh! Ooooooh!"

June 14, 2016 | Unregistered Commenteranmaka57

The fluffy icing on the rabbit cake actually looks delicious., like seven-minute frosting or one of the meringue frostings.

June 14, 2016 | Unregistered Commenterkayk

I'm going to defend the creator of "Blanket of White Silenceā€¦" The cake has sharp edges and adequate piping. The only things that make it a wreck are ;the sparkly pompoms in the top corners and that the people ordering it wanted more than 20 names on the top. (I'll assume the same people shoved random candles into it after it was delivered.)

As to the others:
"Lobster Steroids" is a tragic piece, depicting how modern society forces us to conform to an artificial standard of beauty.

I believe the title of the next one should be "Two Leeches Mustache You A Question"


"An Early Midsummer's Morn Shattered By A Bird Puking" is actually "An Early Midsummer's Morn Shattered By Jane's Parrot Singing." Her puking is both quieter and more melodic than her singing.

June 14, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterJane

The cookie cake is upside down - it is a glass of beer (that is foaming over) sitting on a napkin!

June 14, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterDonna

It's not Velveeta - it's Vogon art.

June 14, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterScaperMama

I agree with Janna (and I'm not an anthropologist.) The first thing I thought of on seeing 'Ode to an Airbrush Tip That Wasn't Screwed on Right' was ancient cave paintings. Maybe the artist was trying to connect with their inner Caveperson and was going on a spiritual hunt for their ancient ancestral totem animal which turned out to be a prehistoric multiple-legged bison-elk-spider-millipede creature which poops in the corner of a cake.

June 15, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterGrumpyGhostOwl

Oh my gosh. Honestly these have made my day lol. The laughter this brings is just terrific. Makes me glad that I no longer buy birthday cakes.. scared of a wreck lol.

June 15, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterArlene Marie

All hail Ute!

June 15, 2016 | Unregistered Commenterserinde

High five, Ute! How come no one else spotted your Discworld reference?

June 15, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterMorag

The loose-tipped air brush was once a cave painting somewhere in France...

June 15, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterRivergoddess

Re Blanket of White Silence... It was kind of them to give Great Gma the largest piece.
@Chrmow, brilliant!
@Jane, Bird singing v. puking - I'll take your word for it - auditory vomit.

June 15, 2016 | Unregistered Commenterjuice

If you watch Spongebob (I have an 11 year old) there is a character named Larry the Lobster who looks a lot like that cake. Maybe he was the inspiration?

June 15, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterJessie

Lobster steroids made me laugh out loud!

June 15, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterKyle

I think the cheese one is an upside down glass of beer on a napkin
Not really sure why the napkin isn't complete, though.

June 15, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterLaurel

On the Velveeta one... is that an axe head, and is it indeed cutting the cheese?

June 15, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterQuizzical

NECKTIE! I think the cheese is the collar of a shirt and they don't know what a necktie looks like. Haha

June 15, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterBrandie

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