My Other Blog

What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen

National Cowboy Poetry Week, 2016

Not gonna lie, minions: Cowboy Poetry Week is one of my favorite weeks of the year here on Cake Wrecks. Because you just never know how much fun writing cowboy poems is 'til you try... and fail spectacularly. EMBRACE THE BAD, MY FRIENDS.


My horse done went and joined Yoga
She loves it and won't ever quit!
My horse done went and joined Yoga
Now this is how she likes to sit.



Oh, what a hoot,
There's a snake in my boot!
Yet over the hissing
I see the other one's missing
So I guess the point is now moot




Trapped in a casket of societal expectations
Bound by tradition, restricted by custom
But I am more
More than these trappings
More than my job and my people!

So cool it with the cow cakes already, Mom.



Whoa there, Nelly!
Whoa there, generic horse name!

You're both drunk.



I asked for a western to see,
You said, "watch this, trust me!"
What you didn't say
(And it's so not ok)
Is that it was Toy Story 3!?

[ugly crying]



I ride and I rustle
And sometimes I shoot.
I'm a cowboy - a cowboy!

Oh, there it is.
Er, I mean, what bliss!
I thank ye most kindly
For being...

[awkward pause]



Thanks to Kelly G., Katie F., Cassie H., Julia K., Silvia C., & Angela P. for rustlin' up today's wrecks.


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Reader Comments (20)

If Frankenstein's monster was a cowboy, those boots would look 'divine' on him.

January 21, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterShirley

Great verses Jen!

It's a shame about poor Nellie, her friend, and the random earthquake-leveled flotsam on that cake, because otherwise the artistry is beautiful. It's like a happy little Bob Ross painting.

January 21, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterAngelaS

I am so confused. Is that a BAND-AID at the top of the Toy Story cookie???

January 21, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterCassandra S.

Okay, now I can say I've seen an artist's abstract rendering of a cake...erm...

January 21, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterVaBeach alemaP

Aside from the all the "dead" horses, it's the "Holly" cow that nails it. ROTFLMAO! Truly!! Love this blog!

January 21, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterMaryO1230

I would actually really love to be the recipient of that deconstructed cow cake. I think it's brilliant.

January 21, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterHeather

This cowgirl is cracking up. :)

January 21, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterStephanie

Those are some of the ugliest (not the scariest) cakes I have seen Dx

January 21, 2016 | Unregistered Commentermindy1

Wreck number two looks like a poo boot. Here in Texas, this occurs pretty often but not to THAT degree. Someone needs to muck out the stable!

January 21, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterMarilyn

I hope Holly Cow had a happy birthday in spite of that cake

January 21, 2016 | Unregistered Commenterexactlywatt

Note to bakers who insist on using edible image paper: always keep extra ink cartridges.

Um...the INK is edible too, right?

January 21, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterMike

Peotry yay!

January 21, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterErica

"Holly cow" has me literally laughing out loud. I think I'll start saying that instead of "holy cow."

January 21, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterGina

Purple mountains majesty. Yep.

January 21, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterKnittedbooties

Oh I love the drunk horses lol. Wow. What a way to celebrate.. uh what were the drunk horses celebrating? Lol.

January 22, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterArlene Marie

Holly cow! It looks like them plaque stabbed is coming after my molar!

January 22, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterJeffrey Foxworthy III

Cowboy Poetry Week always reminds me the of the Bubba Bo Bob Brain episode of Pinky and the Brain:

I am a lab rat I escaped from my cage. Never had a job, never earned minimum wage. But you will respect me YES! Once my plan is unfurled... You will call me your leader, I'll be king of the world!

Ain't half bad. Ain't half good, either.

January 22, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterAllegra

Her name was Holly Cow, and the fellas all said 'Wow!'
The prettiest dang baker on the range,
But what Holly did with fondant would leave anyone despondent
For the cakes she made would all be mighty strange.

There were wonky stars and boots, was the woman in cahoots
With some demon out of decoratin' hell?
And a horse doin' asanas? Was she totally bananas?
She could wreckerate in buttercream as well...

January 22, 2016 | Unregistered Commenterdr handle

As the person who sent in the drunk horse cake, I feel like it's important to note that yes, I do live in Wisconsin.

January 24, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterJulia K

Okay, the first horrible boot cake.....did anyone else pick up on the fact that those decorations on the sides are totally and completely made of craft foam sheets? Like the completely non-edible kind you pick up at Wal-Mart for your Sunday school class when you're ten minutes late, super tired, and completely out of options for a "lesson?"

February 6, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterAmanda

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