I Can Call You Boobie...
March 3, 2014 It's Celebrate Your Name Week, my friends, so I have an extra special gift for a bunch of you with common American names: the gift... of new nicknames.
Bobbie knows what I'm talking 'bout, don't ya, hon'?
;)
Yes, yes she does.
So let's get to it - and fingers crossed you find your name in here!
;)
;)
;)
;)
This one works for Bob *or* Deb. A twofer!
Tiffany, your new nickname just entails everyone using finger quotes when addressing you:
;)
You're "welcome."
;)
This one was almost my favorite - but then I found this:
;)
YOU MAY NOW ADDRESS ME AS "THE GRAND JENNIZZLE."
And while you're at it, bring me some Twix bars. Chop chop!
;)
And you thought three letter names would be safe.
I think this one must be intentional, but it still made me bust a gut:
;)
"I have been, and shall always be, your... wait, who are you?"
Thanks to Ashleigh P., Catherine S., Chelsea P., Chelsea N., Allegra S., Anna, Katie, Dawn L., Hannah W., & Jennifer H. for the great name maim game.
Didn't see your name butchered here? Well, never fear, dear Wreckies; I have so many name wrecks to share I had to split them into two posts - so watch for the second batch later this week!
*****
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Reader Comments (71)
Did John Travolta make these?
Number five could almost be "Bef," too.
FYI, I work with a guy named Bin, so that one may not be a typo.
As someone whose name is often misspelled "Shyron" (which we've decided is my Superhero name) I can relate.
Crazy morning, with hubby on a plane somewhere, so for today's song I'm just going to have to settle for:
Who are you?
Who, who, who, who?
Which would also be a great song foran owl post. Hmmm...
My name was included! "Thank you." :D
My name is hard to spell (an astonishing number of possible misspellings), so I compared it to the e before i in "Weird" for my co-workers. I promptly became "Weirdre". For some reason no one has ever gotten me a cake with my name on it.
It was my birthday yesterday, so this struck deep to my heart. My 7 year old cupcake proudly gave me a homemade card that read, "Happy 22th birthday mommy. Here's a speshul book just for you."
My daughter could be a cake wreckorator - I'm so proud!
We have a guy who's leaving our dept/company after a long tenure next week.. makes me want to go out and order one of those, so long Bob/Bill type cakes, just for him....
hmmm, thinking, thinking...
I got autocorrected! It should have read "Happy 22th brithday mommy. Here's a speshul book just for you."
If you're a Chelsea,
you might once have lovingly
been called a Chesty.
My name is often misspelled as "Nichole." I've never liked it as I always thought it should be pronounced "Ni-chole." I guess I've just gotten tired of seeing it spelled that way. :-/
I'm so telling my husband to call me Jennizzle from now on!
There are 3 nieces, in my husband's family, who are expecting! I'll pass along these names. On another note, freshman year of college, assistant football coach who was teaching a health class called the roll, "Louie Blackberry?"...eh, that was supposed to be me...not even close...
I'm glad no one's ever gotten me a cake with my name on it. My name is Caitlin, and no one ever spells it right on the first try. Sometimes they get it wrong again immediately after I tell them how to spell it. And there are so many variations on how to spell it that they could wreck almost any letter and it might not even look like a wreck unless you knew me.
Because Sharyn's busy:
Veroica
What goes on in that nearby bakery shop?
Are they doing their work in the dark?
Well I ordered a cake and I would have
Sworn it was not for Veroica.
Well I filled out the form and I’m sure it was right
And I carefully wrote down the word.
But now I’m afraid that I’m not even sure if it
Wasn’t Veroica.
Do you suppose they cover up their eyes
And scramble up the names we like
And all the time they laugh at those who buy
The wrecks they love to make
Veroica
Veroica
Did I ask for Beb? Was it actually Bin?
Is Jahnanton spelled like Jeggry
I’m afraid that my order will never be quite right
If I ask for Veronica.
Well it cost all of sixty-five of my bucks
I’m afraid it will never be right
So I gave the young man an order request
With the spelling of “Veronica.”
At that damn bakery
I closed my eyes and tried hard not to see
Jennizzle, Chelfea and dear “Tiffany”
I spoke the name out loud again.
Do you suppose they cover up their eyes
And scramble up the names we like
And all the time they laugh at those who buy
The wrecks they love to make
Veroica
Veroica
Veronica? Veroica.
Wow, my actual nickname in a wrecked cake! My real name is Ellen, which doesn't have a common nickname, but a long time ago my husband morphed it into Elban, and for many years it's just been Bin. It sounds strange when he calls me Ellen, and I do have a photo of my own cake he made me that says Happy Birthday Bin.
At least Jonhnaton can claim this is his coronation cake for ascending to the Egyptian throne at the age of 2 or 3.
Bet my name doesn't come up.
No worries, though. I'm enjoying the other wrecks.
I've seen my name misspelled and mispronounced in so many ways. Kristine with a "K" isn't that unusual, is it?
In old writings, many S's look like F's. Maybe Chelsea has a 17th-century-style cake!
Too bad about the Jeggory cake -- it looked kind of nice until the wreckerator piped in the writing.
SuBee, you are my hero today for that comment! (Or, should I say, "BuSee?")
That fourth one looks like it's for a hitherto unknown Egyptian pharaoh, Tenh-na-ton...
I thought at first that Tonhnaton might be an ancient Egyptian name passed down through the centuries until I finally realized it's the worst attempt at spelling Johnathon I've ever seen.
Bahahah :D
IS it just me that sees the dot on the 'I' in 'Veroica' as a recurring sign? If not, I am changing my name to Veroiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiica. K?
And as for the last one, we can only hope it's a joke....
My name is Marguerite. Everyone misspells it. (The doctor turned in my birth certificate info misspelled and i had to correct it with an official name change.) Many try to joke about it. "Like a margarita? *chuckles*" I found it once on a keychain. I am scared to find out what a wreckerator would do to it.
Even if the Bob/Bill cake was intentional, they still managed to wreck it with the missing apostrophe. Which bakers are so wont to do. ;)
So, new parents who are planning to give their babies creatively spelled names - take heed!
Hilarious. Poor Boobie er Bobby. The one cake with the name crossed out almost seems like a regifted cake. Maybe Bob died and they needed a cake for Bill.
Beb is so much more than a twofer for Deb or Bob: Bev, Jeb, Bet, Bea, Ben, Bub.
I think I'm going to officially (unofficially) change my name to "Tiffany". That way people might wonder what my name *really* is, even though it really is Tiffany. "Tiff"-ception.
I'm thinking the Jennizzle one is intentional, too. Wasn't that a think in recent years -- adding "izzle" to words? Ex. Fo' shizzle.
http://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/-izzle
They got a cake for one Boobie, but not the other twin?
I was going to name my kid Tenhnaton, but it's obviously too common now! Well, at least Jeggrey isn't taken. [scroll] D'oh!
Are we sure "Jennizzle" is a mistake? That's kind of awesome in a 90s kind of way.
Is it just me, or does "Veroica" sound like something on your foot that you treat with Compound W?
Not one of my Aunts ever spelled my name right. Never! At my last job I had to say my name when I answered the phone and 9 times out of 10 they would still call me Jenny. Umm.. no...
My oldest is named Kia. Pronounced just like the car of which there are literally thousands of driving around. 99% of the time she gets called Kiya (long I sound). **sigh** Yes, even 3 letter names can get screwed up.
Tonhnaton reminds me of the Jeff Dunham skit when Peanut is saying Santa Ana.
...that last one is intentional. It is a joke that they won't forget Bill, and haha they pretend on the cake that they have already forgotten him, even before he has left the job. It's a decently done cake, too. The flowers are good, and the writing is very neat and legible. I wouldn't call that a wreak at all! Rather a fun and funny cake for a going away.
The "air quotes" for "Tiffany" are perfect.
Beb could work for Bev, as well, which was my mother's name. And Bin COULD be a Southeast Asian name, but it'd more likely be spelled Binh, so it's wrecked either way, I suppose.
Yay, my son's name is included! Not that he's old enough to get a kick out of that, but *I* think it's awesome. Also, SuBee, "Veroica" made my day.
And who possesses "Tiffany"? Who is this Red Hot Mama person? Because she OWNS "Tiffany"... The apostrophe s indicates this to us.
hahahahahahahaha! This was so funny. I didn't see my name, but half my own family couldn't spell it on normal days, let alone on cakes, when my siblings were younger.
My name has been spelled wrong and pronounced wrong all my life. I'm used to it.
With all of the crazy names out there, I would not be surprised if someone actually named their kid Jennizzle.
I got my boobies at about 11 too :D
I got my boobies at about 11 too :D
The "Tiffany" cake posses more questions. Since "Momma's" is possessive what exactly is a
Last of the Red Hot Momma's "Tiffany"?
I am so curious! What could "Tiffany" be a code word for? {eye waggle}
Is that a jot over the uppercase I in VEROICA? I have never, never understood the insistence of people to put a lower case "i'" in the middle of an all upper case ward. TiME, for instance. But to dot an upper case letter takes dedication.
So THAT's why my high school friends occasionally called another friend, whose name was Veronica, "Vernoica." Now it makes sense. They must have been in a class with her when someone misspelled her name. Or went to her birthday party. It's a little different from the spelling here, but I had always thought they were just being goofy. It also reminds me of my friend Luci's wedding shower cake. Imagine our amusement when we went to pick up the cake and her name was spelled "Ruci." I have regretted ever since not taking a picture. And yes, that was probably a language barrier one as we lived in an area with a great many people who had difficulty with the L sound due to a lack of it in their native language. Still funny, though.
My name is spelled C H R Y S. Pronounced Chris. Or Kris. NOT Chrys(long I like the car). And Chrys is it-not Chrystine, Chrystal, or anything else. Thank God no one has felt the urge to buy me a cake in a long time!!!(the last time it was my ex-sister-in-law before she was an ex...and the bakery didn't get it right-I was only married to her brother for 25 years...should have been a sign!!!)
My name was never spelled wrong on a cake. But it was butchered up by every single teacher that I had.
@BADKarma:
That works, I guess-!-although it sounds painful, and squeaky! The name made me think of "Veruca Salt", from "Charlie and the Chocolate Factory". Either that or a village in Russia. And, frankly, I think that the shardy-jazz on top looks like broken glass from some ugly, 70's-style lampshade.
=^~.-^=
I think the Bob or Deb one can also be Bev.