Friday
Jun282013
Because Everything's Better With The Muppets
June 28, 2013 It's time to bake the music,
;)
It's time to write the slights!
;)
It's time to make some carnage,
;)
At the bakery tonight!
[bahdum dum dum]
It's time to put on makeup,
;)
It's time to dress up right,
;)
By the incredibly talented Say it with Cake!
It's time that we departed,
;)
It's not for the fainthearted,
;)
Oh boy I bet that smarted!
;)
On the least sensational,
inspirational,
celebrational,
Wreckerational
This is what we call the Cake Wrecks Shooooooow!
;)
PPTHHPTHPFFTHPPPT!!!
Thanks to Brianna S., Kate, Stacy F., Vanessa M., Shakera, & Anna I. for the ear worm. And also for getting the Muppet song stuck in our heads.
And now, a little palate cleanser:
Reader Comments (81)
That Hippo cake is really skillfully executed. I wouldn't have the heart to eat it... nor the inclination, now that I come to think about it.
[Editor's note- You are absolutely right. We couldn't find the baker's website so if anyone knows it, let me know and I'll put it in the link. Thanks! -john (thoJ)]
S and M hippo and elephantiasis leg will haunt me O_o
That toejam cake....I cant....I just cant.....
I can only read that as 'smelly pirate hooker'....now, are her clientele stinky pirates or does she need to wash her eye patch, frock coat and wooden leg? I need to know!
There are enough wrecks here to fuel nightmares for about three months.
"Quick! Splash and drizzle the trombone with chocolate syrup! They'll never notice!"
It’s not that easy reading Wrecks,
Having to spend each day looking at such crap,
When it could be nicer seeing flowers, puppies or roadkill
Or something much more appealing like that.
Its not easing reading Wrecks.
Its seems you’re faced with so many other horrific things.
And wreckers tend to make cakes that are jarring,
Not standing out like tasteful , charming Sunday Sweets or
Something (anything!) nice.
But Wreck’s the only site here
That’s both cool and snarky-like.
And Wrecks show me zombie-like Geishas, and ripe pirate hookers
And whatever that red thing's supposed to be.
When wrecks are all there are to see,
It could make you wonder why, but why wonder why
Wonder, I’ll read Wrecks to see the fine wrecks, they’re confounding
And I think they’re what I want to see.
A disturbing, late-braking thought relative to the cake-like item posted a few days ago that was "decorated" by repeatedly dragging the fingers through the icing;
What does one naturally do to the gobs of icing adhering to the finger tips before the next trip through the icing?
EEEEEWWWWWW!
Oh but this is not fair the hippo is certainly NOT a wreck! Would qualifiy for an inaproppiate cakes edition of Sunday Sweets.
Best post ever.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nEjPDS8Jp1E
anybody reminded of this when you saw that hippo cake?
I want that Dom hippo cake for my birthday in 18 days she is hawt!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n4BkdvhNeqk
this is a better clip...has the whole thing with the dancing hippos.
Sexy Hippo is awesome.
Lazy Eye Geisha, not so much.
#1 Retrospect. This word was chosen to commemorate the moment when realization struck that a CCC is never a good idea.
#2 Never order an insult cookie between the hours of four and six pm, unless your intended victim actually is an aparttment-dwelling piratte.
#3 Please don't make me know the back story on this. I want it to have started out as a nice-looking cake, only the driver took a wrong turn and wound up winning the Indy 500 before finally finding his or her way home.
#4 "Once you have found her, never let her go..." without her thyroid medication, ever again.
#5 Doesn't this just have to be competently executed. I'm somewhat curious about the story on this one, but I'm afraid it will make some kind of sense, and the universe will never again be the same.
#6 See #1.
#7 Kennon likes monsters, right? This was verified? This could be the most artfully concealed CCC I've yet seen, which may or may not add to the scary factor.
#8 No curiosity here. None. [Reaches for Unsee Machine]
#9 Jamming the mouthpiece that far into the bell is a sure sign that the trombone was not someone's first choice of instrument. Whether player or listener I don't know, but they evidently decided to celebrate with cake.
Did the T-Rex get hold of Kermit to create Wreck #2?
Anyone who can pun the words to the Muppet Song is aces in my book!!
Retrospective cake
gets used to disappointment.
Not real buttercream.
The hippo. Oh my!!!
The trombone cake might have worked if they hadn't covered it with shiny ganache, syrup, whatever. :P
Smelly Pirate Hooker! It's from www.rantsfrommommyland.com. Two of my favorite blogs meet, it's such a small multiverse.
I miss the Muppet Show.
Admit it, "smelly pirate hooker" is John's pet name for Jen.
So which one of you ordered the happy hooker hippo (hippo dominatrix) cake?
I so totally didn't need to see that hippo.
THE EYES!! Both the geisha and the hippo winking at me (WHY is she winking at me?) are going to reappear at parent-teacher conferences, I just know it.
What's weird is that when I close my eyes, I can see that toe jam cake.
I'm on team hippo. Sorry.
Oh boy, have I got an opening joke for you... never mind, it looks like the Wrecks beat me to it! Ahhhh?
Cake numero 5 reminds me of 'Meet the Feebles'
It's days like these when I wish we had a few more background stories about why these cakes were ordered. Or, as Craig pointed out, how cake #3 ended up the way it did. Please tell me it got tossed about in the car on the way home while avoiding two accidents, and not that someone ordered a cake to look like a tossed salad.
Very stressful day ahead. Thanks for the laughs!
I kinda like #7 - it looks like a Gorn!
Hey, hippos don't have...
Just forget it. Movin' right along.
Thanks a lot Jen - I had to stop myself from humming along more than once!
LOVE THIS!
So now, I will forever wonder if she is a hooker only for smelly pirates or if she, with a hygiene problem, is employed as both pirate and hooker.
In RETROSPECT, I have to say that the "colon" is tilted.
(I'd probably end up with a tilted colon, too, if I were to eat that day-glo crap.)
=^>.<^=
for me, the worst one is the toejam. because i am guessing, and i REALLY hope i am wrong - this was someone who is diabetic and had to have toes removed. and then that was celebrated - WITH CAKE. that is the only conclusion i can come to - which is a horrible horrible thing.
@ShirleyFowley:
Well, "one" licks it off, "naturally".
What's a few gagimillion germs between friends...
=^-.-^=
In retrospect, inventing a double-dotted half-eighth note was probably a bad idea.
Now I want a dragon dominatrix cake.
While #2's balloons don't really look like balloons, they don't look like li'l swimmers, either. So, there's that.
Hey! I think Godzilla looks great, too.
The 'No More Toe Jams' cake reminds me of Aunt Marge when she got blown up. Er, like a balloon. Not exploded.
Awww, Wonder Woman dropped her magic lasso in a mud puddle. No, I suppose it doesn't really look much like a magic lasso, but neither does it look like a trombone!
@SuBee: Bravo!
@Shirley Fawley: Teehee!
Thanks, @anony mouse, for identifying that last cake. I was wondering what a huge misshapen bracelet had to do with music notes.
Add me as a sexy hippo lover. It is the fishnet stockings that got me.
SPEAKING of "Jack-in-the-box," the 3rd thing down could easily be nicknamed a "Gack-in-the-box".
I know, no one actually mentioned "Jack-in-the-box". That's why I brought it up...(heh,heh).
((Hollering:"Hey! Can I get a NAPKIN over here?!?"))
=^-.-^=
And John and Jen are like Statler and Waldorf, sitting back and providing the humorous commentary... :)
MUPPETS! WOOOOOHOOOOO!!! I LOVE THE MUPPETS!!!!!
Ok, got that out of my system now... :-) Would stick around & comment more but got errands to run...maybe later... Least I saw Sharyn's masterful parody, Craig's latest list & Haiku Joy's Haiku of the Day. PS to Haiku Joy - I taught A & P lab for a year @ the local community college. Shout out if you need some help, K? And I suggest getting some mini-models of the skeleton & bones to help learn all the names. Also an A & P coloring book. Yep, it's real & very, very helpful. Med students swear by it. And post lists in the bathroom to review each time...ok, that's probably TMI but it works!!! (and it's no worse sounding than looking @ these wrecks!!! :-)
Is the name on the green thing "Kennon"?
I wonder if maybe little Kennon is gonna have himself/herself *fun* from preschool all the way up to THERE with a special name like that. But good way to toughen the kid up, y'know?! (I know, because my daughter has an unusual name that her father had picked, and she HATED it all the way up to high school, when she decided that it was REALLY UNIQUE and COOL, and started loving it!)
=^?.?^=
@WorrierPrincess. Ha! Brilliant. Music geeks unite!
Little-known fact. Japanese women in the Edo period, who were supposed to perform seppuku (hara-kiri) did not actually cut their bellies like men, but their throats for a quicker death.
The Geisha depicted here seems to have had to perform that ceremony.
I wonder what that third cake was supposed to have been before it got smushed? There was an awful lot of....stuff on it by the looks of it. o_O
Hurrah for the Muppets - both the post and Su-Bee's FANTASTIC "Being Green" redux. Really made my Friday. Also, I should really REALLY know my now, but "Gack-in-the-box" nearly resulted in a colourful display of herbal tea on the keyboard and dual screens. Bravo! :)
In keeping with today's themes the Muppets, dirty pirates and John Cleese (the special guest in the theme song clip), I give you this: http://youtu.be/J4tTjMdk5k0
smelly pirate hooker is a quote that actually originated from Anchorman. Ron Burgundy tells Veronica Corningstone that she is a smelly pirate hooker!
Ouch. My head hurts. I just can't un-see that hippo!!
Just what we need when our toes have been removed, a cake to celebrate! It is wrong, just wrong. Cake #3 has got to be somebody placing the sack of potatoes on the box as you go through checkout or something or maybe the dog threw up on it!