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What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen
Monday
Oct142013

Turkey Talk

"Well, hello, there! SO nice to see you."

 

"Absolutely stunning weather we're having, don't you think?"

 

"Say, have you done something with your hair? Because it. looks. fabulous."

 

"And those shoes! So perfect!"

 

"Did you catch the game last night? I do love our boys, but I gotta say the other team beat us, fair and square."

 

"Ah, would you look at all these teenagers running around??

Such well-behaved youngsters, all of 'em."

 

"You know, I always enjoy meeting new people, but you have been especially delightful."

 

"No, no, please, after you. Bye, now!"

 

Happy Canadian Thanksgiving, everyone.

 

Thanks to Brandi, Cheyenne D., Jessica, Lindsay B., Marie, Stephani, Rhonda G., & Joanna for being extra nice.

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Reader Comments (47)

Poops and phalluses all.

October 14, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterFluffy Cow

Sung to "Talk Dirty to Me"

They're so nice and
Their weather's adored
Love your hair and
Love your shoes some more
They're good sports and
Their kids aren't abhorred
So gracious...
Talk turkey to me.

October 14, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterSharyn

Is that BACON on the last one?

October 14, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterPatti

I know, there are a lot of people out there that do really love icing, but the amount that is slathered on some of the cakes here has my gallbladder acting up just from looking at them. plus, while the horrible CCC's (patooie) seem to be on the decline, what's with all the half-cakes? the one in the last pic is one of the best i've seen on here, and that about sets the scale for all the others that have been posted. it just doesn't look good. plus it is probably a pain in the behind to cut.

October 14, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterLcP

I'm very worried for that first one. His head is ON FIRE!!

October 14, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterDebs

Interesting...use of the heart pan, and I didn't know turkeys came in so many colors, all tacky. Apparently these are the Herb Tarlecs (ah, now I *am* showing my age...) of the turkey world. Perhaps they can fly?

October 14, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterSaraCVT

lots of brown icing today...all I can say is it's apro-poo.....

October 14, 2013 | Unregistered Commentermel

The Leo-Pavo -
nature's inspiration for
the rainbow clown wig.

October 14, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterHaiku Joy

....why does the last one (OMG! BACON!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!) have flowers coming out it's backside?

October 14, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterIsabella

I think the red part on that third one is supposed to be the turkey's comb, but in stead it looks like a tongue sticking out and that the turkey is dead.

October 14, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterJodi

My dad is fond of saying every Thanksgiving "The only good kind of turkey is a roasted one." After seeing these cakes I know he's right!

October 14, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterGingerSnap

#4 looks like he's wearing a Native American headdress?
#5 just looks gross. Even if it is chocolate. And that's saying something!
# 6 reminds me of the peacock o.O

I'm with you guys, I see bacon (!!!) on the last one too! Dang it, usually I come to CW to help my diet but this time y'all just made me hungry!

October 14, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterJodee

Thanks for the little reminder that Turdkey Cake season is upon us.

w00t.

October 14, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterBADKarma

SaraCVT you ROCK. as Les Nessman would have said "OH the HUmanITY!" "Turkeys are plummeting to the earth!" Mr. Carlson "who knew Turkeys couldn't fly?"

October 14, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterJamie Jo

I was thinking that the world would be a much better place if everyone talked like those turkeys. How refined and polite. Then you sprang the "Canadian Thanksgiving" thing on us and it all made sense. Why can't we all be Canadians, eh?

October 14, 2013 | Unregistered Commenterbassgirl

As God is my witness, I thought turkeys could fly!

Thanks @SaraCVT and @Jamie Jo!

October 14, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterJodee

Have none of those people seen a turkeyO_o

October 14, 2013 | Unregistered Commentermindy1

@SaraCVT and Jaime Jo: LOL! I just re-watched the pilot episode of WKRP the other day on Netfilx (or was it hulu?). Oh my but that show is awesome.

FIL Update: FIL is off the respirator, wakes and is able to say a few words here and there. That tube abused his vocal cords, but he is doing well, off all or at least most of the machines, and The Husband hopes he will be moved from ICU soon. Thank you all so much for your prayers and well wishes!

October 14, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterJust Andrea

That first one seems to be a jive turkey to me.

October 14, 2013 | Unregistered Commenterannaflixion

A Herb Tarlek reference!! Perfect! My day is complete. And yes, bacon.

October 14, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterTracy

Ookay my dirty mind is firmly intact. Who doesn't love a pervy turkey? Now I want bacon.

October 14, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterBarbara

Youngest Daughter, upon viewing this post, had one thing to say: "Canadians get Thanksgiving BEFORE us?? That is SO not FAIR!!"

After all, a girl needs priorities.

October 14, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterSaraCVT

@Jamie Jo: I had to look that up ( Les Nessman/ "who knew Turkeys couldn't fly?") I haven't exactly been living under a rock, but I'd never even heard of this. Sick, and horrible! (Note to self: Curiosity isn't all it's cracked up to be.)
:-(

October 14, 2013 | Unregistered Commentersendingtheclowns

@Isabella-I think the correct question is, why can't all turkies have flowers coming out their backsides?

October 14, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterSuBee

Spent a week in Canada this summer. What a lovely, lovely week. People yielding to pedestrians, waiting patiently in queues, being polite. Simply wonderful.

Happy Thanksgiving, Canada!

October 14, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterGinger

Ah, it's getting around to that time of year where I have to go and check what a turkey looks like.

October 14, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterEmma

Ohh, Canadian Thanksgiving...and Canadians are polite. I get it now, but my first guess was the turkey's talk meant they were full of s%@$! 'Cause, you know, they look like piles of ..... ☺

October 14, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterNolaChick

I liked #4. Looks like an indian headress but at least he looks happy! LOL
jamie jo. That was one of the best episodes. "Omygod ,They're hitting the ground like sacks of wet cement"

October 14, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterMoonflwr

Happy Thanksgiving from a Canadian. I cooked turkey dinner for eight on Saturday night and was a guest at turkey dinner last night. Here's a link to a turkey cupcake cake that I bought for Thanksgiving dinner in 2008! :D

October 14, 2013 | Unregistered Commentersamatwitch

I bet the middle cupcake on turkey #6 has 3 inches of icing on it. I call it, dibs, it's mine. JK :p

October 14, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterTrasawee

Funny, I had WKRP on my mind last week and looked it up on Wikipedia!!And now here we are on CW with the same references I was looking up!! (doodoodoodoodoo---the twilight zone)

I guess none of these bakers have seen an actual wild turkey...they are ugly as sin but DO NOT look like poo!!!! And yes, turkeys can actually fly short distances.........when they are alive and have feathers

October 14, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterWildDuck

I hate to break it to everyone that the last turkey, erm mutant, is not wearing bacon. It just looks a bit like bacon because of how they filled the piping bag with different layers of frosting then piped it through a large flat piping applicator.

Just for the record, I too saw bacon the first time I looked at it.

October 14, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterIsolder74

Are you sure about #2? Because I'm fairly certain it's actually a... er... *snow*man, eh?

October 14, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterMumshie

Always good to hear good news, Just Andrea!

October 14, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterHaiku Joy

@Sharyn - As I'm married to a Poison fan, I especially applaud your song choice today.

@SaraCVT - (no relation) Love that you brought it around to WKRP, which led to Moonflwr quoting my fave line from that scene.

Personally, I feel cake #4 looks like those little dinosaurs that took out "Newman" in Jurassic Park with their hood fully extended.

October 14, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterSaraV

Thanks @Just Andrea for the update! So glad he is improving. Still sending hugs your way ((((Andrea))))

October 14, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterJodee

@Just Andrea: glad to hear the good news...!!!

October 14, 2013 | Unregistered Commentermel

Bacon Turkey tried to fly and landed on some flowers and squished them.

October 14, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterLindarella

As G-d is my witness, these turkeys will *never* fly.

October 14, 2013 | Unregistered Commentersnapdragon

@Just Andrea- great news! :) Thanks for the update and still keeping you and yours in my thoughts.

on 6 & 8 I adore the plumage ("fabulous, Harry, I love the feathers!")
though I suspect #6 is a kissing cousin of the NBC peacock

@SaraCVT there's always a nod to Cincinnati when we have turkeys here :D

October 14, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterBarbara Anne

My dear Ms. Yates,

I am utterly charmed to have discovered your Technicolour remembrance of our beloved Thanksiving celebration up here in the far-from-frozen North. (Seriously, we were wearing shorts in Toronto today.) My only regret is that the day was far advanced by the time I was able to peruse your delightful collection of icing-smeared atrociturkeys, as I spent most of the day eating a much more creditable version of the poultry in question.

And how very kind of you to perpetuate the stereotype that Canadians are terribly, terribly polite at all times! I must confess that commuting into downtown using major highways and public transportation has somewhat soured my belief in the universality of such a national trait. In fact, I often have to bite my tongue to keep from uttering what might be termed "curse words" in the general direction of the s.o.b.s* who cut me off in traffic... although I confess that I am unable to ascertain whether my restraint is due to my Canadianness or to the fact that there is a pair of little ears riding in the backseat ready to parrot whatever he hears.

In any case, allow me to offer my congratulations once again on a consistently wonderful addition to my daily grind! I remain,

Yours very sincerely,
StriderGirl

* Sons of Backbacon

October 14, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterStriderGirl

I can't help but think "cockaPOOdlePOO" (yes, I know that's a rooster, but otherwise I'd have to say POObble POObble and I don't think it has quite the same ring).

Happy Thanksgiving, eh?

@JamieJo, I watched that very WKRP this afternoon! That was one of their most brilliant episodes.

@Just, thanks for the update. I'm so glad your FIL is doing better! Mine gets out of the hospital Thursday or Friday. Hugs to you and your family.

October 14, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterZippy

Lol the time for turdkeys and poopkins has arrived apparently. Wow that last one did look like it had bacon but nope just a ton of frosting guaranteed to make any child have a sugar rush. And adults too by the looks of it if one dared to try and eat it.

October 15, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterArlene

That first poor bird has been stabbed a few times!
And the turdbirds in number three have a pooberry pie for you! Gross!

October 15, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterJillM

To date myself even further than WKRP, #1 kind of reminds me of the Kellogg's Corn Flakes Rooster more than a turkey. I spent summers at my aunts farm in Manitoba and she raised turkeys and none of their backside feathers ever looked like a" Maple tree in Autumn". Now I have to go put my potpie made from Sunday's leftovers in the oven. Tomorrow I start the soup what's left. Cheers from Toronto

October 15, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterNetasha

Oh, the turkey posts get me every time. That last guy looks like a poster child for Turkey weight watchers! :D And @Sharyn...dear goodness...who would get a song like that stuck in someone's head?!?! :D hahahaha

October 15, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterStoich91

@Just Andrea - Thanks for the update. Still sending (((((HUGS))))) & prayers your way.

@everyone referencing the WKRP episode - Did you know that ep was based on a REAL incident? A radio station really did give away live turkeys by shoving them out a helicopter. Least, that's what they said on the WKRP special when they discussed where they found the ideas for their scripts. Hard to believe, but that's what they said. I remember thinking "No way! No one could be that stupid!" Of course, I didn't think cakes could be quite so messed up before I saw Cake Wrecks, either.

October 16, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterKarateLady

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