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What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen
Wednesday
Nov102010

Picture Perfect

The Good: You hired a fabulous wedding photographer.

The Bad: Not so much with the baker.

The Ugly:


This has to be the most beautiful photo of a Wreck I've ever seen. The fact that the photographer submitted it - along with tales of watching the baker catch the toppling cake with her bare, unwashed hands before serving it - only adds to the beauty.

And really, what's a photographer tasked with making a wedding Wreck look good supposed to do? Well, after careful study, I've come up with a few options.

Option 1: Try an action shot in the background.

"Ok, bride, groom? You two stand behind the cake here. Now...reach for that wineglass!"

"Hmm, not quite enough action. Bride's dad? How about a running tackle?"

Option 2: Flowers

"We're gonna need another bunch for the middle tier, stat."

Option 3: Blend it with a busy background.

"Cake? What cake?"

Option 4: More flowers.


No, seriously. MORE FLOWERS.

Perfect.

You: But, Jen, those cakes look great!

Me: Exactly.

Option 5: PhotoShop

Take that Wreck from this...



...to this!

The irony, of course, is they'll pay more for the retouched photo than they did for the cake.

Oh, and to whoever starts a cake photo retouching service after reading this post: I want my cut.



Option 6: When all else fails, at least get the money shot.


"Lady, I'm here to document this moment for posterity, not catch cake."

Thanks to Wreckporters D Tyler Photography., Tiffany A., Jen A., Wendy T., Andrew Jordan Photography, Jennifer J., Jacq, Random, Rebecca Z, & Coffee Table Photo Book.

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Reader Comments (94)

YOu know, some of the calla lillies on option 3 aren't all that bad. Maybe the wreckerator bought them. Some, however, have some really weird and unnatural angles to them.

November 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterTrevor

That last one's absolutely classic!

November 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterMuria

O. M. G. !!!

LOVE the last 'photo, not catch'!

I feel so sorry for the brides.

Cake retouch photography... you may be onto something there, Jen! I'm sure the 'net will be flooded with ads on FB for just that - I give it two days.

*giggle*
~~Di

wv - ennosece -- I getta that cake ennosece... oops, too alate.

November 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

The polka dot ones look like they let their kids make their cakes. How hard is it to make round circles?

November 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterPeg

I love the action shot of the cake falling. At my wedding, I had a shot like that, but it was of my Mother-in-Law tackling the girl catching my bouquet.

My WV is dooho... too easy!

November 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterLillyW

We need a link to the story of the first cake :D

November 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterJan Andrea

I want to hug that last photographer.

November 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterFluffy Cow

The falling one is the best. And honestly, if I was the bride, I would probably have been in tears on the day it happened, but in retrospect I would be so glad that I had the pictures! I would refer everybody to that photographer, because that's called foresight.

<a href="http://fantasycasting.blogspot.com>Fantasy Casting</a>

November 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterGina

It looks like the bride in the topper of the first cake has a cape. Maybe she's preparing to fly away from the wreck.

November 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterMarnie

As a sometimes-wedding photographer, I can truly appreciate these. The last one, though... sheer genius.

November 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAmanda Mac

2 and 4b actually look like pretty good photos. :) Love the 'capture the moment' idea.

November 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterA

The last cake -- aside from structural instability -- didn't really look all that bad. It looked rather nice, really, except for the whole gravity take over and such.

However, photographers have a long history of seeing everything through the lens, watching and not acting. If they have trouble taking action during natural disasters and in war zones, I certainly understand not diving in to save a doomed cake. Also, that much sugar could ruin a lens. MUCH better to just document.

November 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterSherri

wv: wregic = wreck + tragic

November 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterJessica

Great post. That last one is AWESOME

November 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAmy's Cooking Adventures

I think the first and last cakes prove a good point-- at a wedding, a good photographer is more important than a good cake. The photos will last forever, the misery will only last until enough time has passed that one can laugh about how awful the cake was. Seriously, how can one not appreciate that last photo???

The sad thing was, the first and last look like expensive cakes-- I'll cut the middle ones some slack (puns intended) given they look reasonably priced. Although the photoshopped cake-- that baker should be ashamed. I can do better, and I'm an amateur who fusses over the flavours of the multiple layers (mousse, ganache, meringue, cake etc) not the aesthetics.

November 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAliza

Thank you for an awesome post on my birthday!
My condolences to the bride, but my heartiest congratulations to the photographers (especially the last one).

November 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnne-with-an-e

Y'know, if everything goes exactly right, you don't have any great stories to tell later on. I can hear the bride now..."and the cakefall is even on CakeWrecks!!!"

"I'm a photographer, Jim, not a cake-catcher!" *snork*

November 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterMindy

Those are absolutely sad excuses for wedding cakes.

Aliza is right, the photog IS more important than the cake.. These have got to be examples of when Aunti Margaret offers to do the cake as a gift... then runs out of her arthritis pills.

My office is having a bake off today and I know i could have done better with my cake (I got interupted last nite and ran short on time). But these are just bad. I certainly needed this today. Now I'm not feeling so bad. Thanks Jen.

November 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterSandy also in SoFla

Option 5 works best if you have a good story ready to explain why the cake seems to speeding by at 60 mph.

And up until now, I never thought there could be such a thing as too many flowers at a wedding.

November 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Hmmm, kamikaze cake, that's a new innovation. I'm surprised some of the previous cakes didn't follow the last one's example and throw themselves off the table in despair.....

November 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterCaroline B

I LOVED this post!!

I also wanted to let you know how much I have been appreciating my move to the west coast, now that I'm 3 hours behind you, you almost always post before I go to work!

November 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterSammie

at least the last one had enough left on the table to give everyone a taste??

wv: emudou: the emu do-ed it

November 10, 2010 | Unregistered Commenterjoyce

He should've caught the cake.

No basic decency at all.

Of course he DID get his photo on Cake Wrecks, so it's probably okay. The photograph had his priorities in order.

November 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterMary Connealy

Ohmygosh!! lol I really want to know how that last one played out. How perfect!

November 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterRachel

Option 2:
Orange & blue wedding colors? Even if the groom plays for the Broncos, no. Tiger lilies and hydrangeas just look wrong together.

Amazing that the wrecker can make such perfect circles in contrast to lumpy icing and irregular borders. The dots just like the foam sheet cutouts you can buy. Not that a wrecker would ever stoop to that.

November 10, 2010 | Unregistered Commenterjohn

Wow! I love it. Especially the Photoshop option.

On a side note. I wonder what the statistics are on cakes that bite the dust at weddings. I'm not talking so much dropped cakes (although that would be interesting to know too) as multi tiered cakes that collapse.

November 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterRachael

Oh, those are just hilarious! The photographer for the last one...brilliant, indeed!

Ha!

November 10, 2010 | Unregistered Commenterlisadh

Okay, I've just given up cake after seeing these photos. Well, I needed to anyway.

November 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterNick

As a wedding photographer, is it bad that I would LOVE to capture the moment in the last picture? hehe Those are the things that make you laugh later on (for some brides it might be MUCH later, but still). We've actually never had a cake fall down mid-reception, but there have been a few "Hurry and cut the cake now, before it falls over, so we can rush it to the kitchen" kind of moments. And God knows we have seen some AWEFUL wedding cakes.

November 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterKelly Pratt Photography

I am so disturbed that the photographer took pictures of the cake falling down and didn't try to help! lol

November 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Timberrrrrrrrrrrr!

November 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterSuzanne

Oh my gosh! I just went back and reviewed this post, and noticed that, on Cake #5 (the white and lavender beauty) the carboard round is still on the second tier!!!! Snap - and Fail!

Poor, poor brides. I do concur with a previous poster who said that having catastrophes like these make for much better wedding stories. My sister's reception venue had a kitchen fire the night before her wedding, so we had to scramble to find a place at 10 o'clock on Friday night for her Saturday afternoon wedding. It turned out beautiful, and we have a great story to tell.

WV colst - None of these cakes were colst to being beauties...

November 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnne-Marie

That last picture is fantastic. Not to mention it's going to be great proof at the lawsuit the bride brings against the baker!

November 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterLizzy Leigh

I am still giggling quietly behind my computer screen at the photoshop cake. Who would choose a polka dot cake anyway?

November 10, 2010 | Unregistered Commenternona_bear

That action photo is awesome. What timing!

-Holly

November 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Why would a photographer want to catch a falling cake? To get frosting all over her expensive equipment? What could she do with one hand anyway? Punch a hole in it as it fell? I like that she got the shot - What a pro!

November 10, 2010 | Unregistered Commenter~Alissa

I am silently giggling behind my computer screen. The photoshop cake is something I almost want to share with coworkers. Who picks polka dots anyway?

November 10, 2010 | Unregistered Commenternona_bear

I can't believe that photographer managed to catch the moment as the cake was collapsing. It makes me wonder if someone called him over because the cake looked ready to fall.

I hope that if the photographer saw it looking ready to fall, he'd at least call "hey, someone should take care of this cake!" while standing ready to take the pictures in case it fell.

November 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterJoyfulBee

The sad part as that most of the "professional" $3,000.00 cakes on Cake Wars, Cake Boss, Cake whatever it's called, actually look like those ones.

Mmmm... play dough *gag* *cough* *choke*

http://www.theladyslounge.com

November 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterThe Lady's Lounge

I wouldn't be surprised that the photographer was standing 10 or 15 feet away from the cake when it fell. There are some really incredible lenses out there that don't require you to be right on top of the subject in order to take a really close-in shot. So it very well may have been more a case of the photographer not close enough to do anything as much as it might have been lack of desire to get his/herself full of frosting on trying to rescue a doomed cake.

November 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterJennifer

To be honest - if a cake is falling over you hardly have time to wash your hands before catching it do you?
I'm new to cake decorating but not even my first cake looks like these ones.
Hopefully these brides didnt pay much for these cakes!!

Love the site thanks for the laughs xx

November 10, 2010 | Unregistered Commenterwendalls

Run cake, run! Be free cake!

November 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterMaddie

Shouldn't that read "When all else *falls*, at least get the money shot"? Heh heh.

November 10, 2010 | Unregistered Commenterjengersnap

when your cake starts out looking like it was modeled after the leaning tower of pisa, really, are you allowed to be surprised when it falls over?

November 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterALKD

"More Flowers" looks a LOT like a cake funeral. Which one died? And how thoughtful that people sent so many wreaths...

November 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterFPGSPC Secretary

The longer I looked at the last photo, the more I laughed at it. The caption was PERFECT!

November 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterLaurie

I don't know if this is funny or sad... but in my mind I can almost picture what these cakes are ACTUALLY supposed to look like!

Love the action shot :-)

November 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterMelissa

It's official, I LOVE you two! And what the heck is up with shoving ANY flower into a cake?? I believe I saw ranunculus and they are slightly toxic. Hmmm.... uh, no, and NO! What's next? oleander cake toppers?!
Jeez people, organic, EDIBLE flowers only, or put um in a container set into the cake! unless you want to send your guests to the hospital, or the cemetery.

November 10, 2010 | Unregistered Commentery

Gawrsh. I can make a better-looking cake in my kitchen - now that I think of it, I have made better looking cakes. Many times. And I even know enough to put in some support structure so the cakes don't succumb to gravity!

Merry at Annie's Book Stop

WV: "blembash" - see photo of falling cake for illustration of "blembash"... a combination of a faulty cake construction (blem) and the result thereof (bash).

November 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Aw, c'mon... I don't usually post twice, but the new WV is so perfect!

Merry at Annie's Book Stop

"tolomp" - the noise the cake makes as it hits the floor.

November 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

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