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What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen
Wednesday
Jan272010

A Teaching Moment

 

Created to commemorate the students and teachers that make our communities proud, today's cakes truly deserve to be in a class of their own.

 

 

Ah, you can always count on teachers to critique your work.
Just be glad they couldn't find the red gel icing.

 

 


Who knew that the HoFsTra STudenrT GoveraNeNT AssoCiaTion were such big fans of croquet?
(I think my spell check just exploded.)

 

 

Oddly enough, I believe "Happy School Social" was the name of my 3rd grade dance. Yep. Slightly sad, awkward spaces, the occasional glaring failure...gee, there are all kinds of parallels going on here.

 

 


Hey, "Alumni Mentors," thanks SOOO much for everything. You're really "great." We are SOOO "glad" you could teach us how to "communicate" properly.

 

And lastly....

A certain school was celebrating great scores on the TAKS, which I believe is some kind of state-mandated testing like the FCAT, which we all know teachers everywhere adore and wish they had more of. Anyway, the cake was supposed to say "Congratulations for doing an exemplary job on TAKS", and the woman ordering asked that "TAKS" be in all capital letters.

Here's what they got:

 

"Congratulatiun for doing and Exernplary Jabon TAKS Capitol Letter"

 

That'll be $44.99, please!

 

Many thanks to Brittany S., Stephanie W., Sarah M., Mary R., & Vanessa for the "exernplary" wreckporting.

- Related Wreckage: Ode to Irony

 

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Reader Comments (97)

Worryingly, the "happy school social" cake looks like it's made from kebab meat.

Was that also true of your 3rd grade dance?

January 27, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterEstesark

Maybe the last cake should have been in sarcastic quotes and used to train the kids who didn't do well on TAKS.

"Okay, kids. Find all the mistakes and you can have a piece. And you'll have another chance next year on TAKS!"

Sidenote: When I was in Texas public school (forever ago), it was called TASP. I think they changed it because if you try to say "TASP" more than once a day, your brain will asplode.

January 27, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterTaylor@MyOlderBrothers

Oh man! On that first cake, instead of the sign reading "Sorry your cake is ugly (blame Kroger)" maybe it should have said "Hey what did you really expect with only 15 minutes notice?".

The grocery store bakery... for times SO special that any place open on the way to work will do

January 27, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterChad

Auugggghhh!!! The first cake burned out my retinas!!! I can’t go on!

:D

Being Mozart’s birthday today, I give all of thee…a Mozart Cake!

http://www.flickr.com/photos/36761760@N02/3481078492/

^..^
TigerWolfgang

January 27, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterTigerwolf

Ugh. Ugh, ugh. What is wrong with the employees of todays supermarkets??!?! I'm a teenager and I'm sure I could do better. Maybe I'll get a cake decorating job this summer. UGH.

*sigh*

January 27, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterLoulou246

As an AU "alumni" I "truly" appreciate the "ironic symbolism" in a communication cake that "thanks" mentors...
Capitol Letters! (it is in D.C. ya know)

January 27, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterBrittany

Don't know how many lawyer type people you get, but Hofstra is a law school.

I assume the croquet mallet is supposed to be a gavel.

WV: lincenti. License to eat pasta?

January 27, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterDocRummel

The balloons were done so well on the last one... such a shame that someone with a 6 year old skill level (or less) was assigned to the text. (and im detecting another phone order mishap here as well i think)

January 27, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterEvalis

I can't believe they spelled "exemplary" right.

January 27, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterSurfie

The random capitalization one hurts me. Badly.

January 27, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterThe Boob Nazi

Go Vera Nents!!!

January 27, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

So how quickly do you think they wrote the hot mess on that last cake? It looks like my handwriting when I'm holding a kid with my right arm and writing with my left hand!

January 27, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAmanda Mac

TAKS is the Texas Assessment of Knowledge and Skills and Exemplary is the highest level a school or district can get. It's a super gigantic deal and my four kids are sick to death of hearing about it!

January 27, 2010 | Unregistered Commenterjennie w.

Yep - TAKS is Texas Assessment of Knowledge and Skills, (when I took it it was TAAS - Texas Assessment of Academic Skills) which as a teacher (sort of) is a bunch of bull. Too much focus on scores and not enough on actually learning and retaining information. But I digress...

Those are some special cakes. Maybe the one with all the caps is a kid who forgot they weren't typing a text message or IM?

January 27, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAmy

Love the TAKS cake! Being a Texas public school teacher, I can see the ironic joy! Go Texas! TASP, TABS, TEAMS, TAAS, TAKS, and the newly announced STAAR!

January 27, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterMarie

Yah know,it will take only 1 or 2 minutes to write out the message with a toothpick into the frosting, before doing the lettering.

January 27, 2010 | Unregistered Commenterblue

Gavel or mallet
matters not to miniscule
fleeing cyan worms.

January 27, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterHaiku Joy

My sister and I are both shaking our heads at these. Sad, sad, sad...
But funny.
The "I think my spell check just exploded" line cracked me up hugely. :)

January 27, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterStephanie

"Jabon Taks". That'd be a good name for a science fiction character. I'll have to remember that.

January 27, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterJasini

I love the rAndoM capiTalIztion.

I think that helps hide spelling mistakes...yes?

January 27, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterLindalou

Always kind of sad to see schools misspelling words and using incorrect grammar on cakes, signs, banners, etc.

January 27, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterBetty

Uhm, wow...

That last one? I honestly had to read it a dozen times, or more, before I had the least idea of what it was supposed to say. And I'm STILL not convinced I got it right!

A bad day for the English Language, but a good one for Wreck fans everywhere. :D

January 27, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Correct me if I'm wrong, but the Alumni Mentors cake is actually a proper use of quotation marks. Aside from passive-aggressive emphasis, it really seems like quotation marks had another purpose... dear me, what could it be?

Oh yeah, quoting someone's words! Hence QUOTATION marks!

So as long as "Thank you Alumni Mentors" is something someone is saying--highly likely--this is a 100% correct use of quotation marks.

If it had said "Thank you Alumni 'Mentors'" or something, you would be right. But as is, it's like the Cake Wrecks community is now so spooked by quotation marks that it sets off an alarm in the brain no matter whether it's used correctly or not.

January 27, 2010 | Unregistered Commenterdustthouart

WOW. Just. WOW.

January 27, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterSabrina

What uglY messEs :D

January 27, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterLauren Borquez

I'm strangely proud that the school of "communication" I graduated from turned out a Cake Wreck.

I'm also now craving mounds of white icing...

January 27, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAU Alum

"Jabon" is Spanish for "soap," so that Texas school must have done an "exemplary soap TAKS," for which it got a congratulatory letter from the Capitol (maybe from the Governor?).

January 27, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterGary

The spell-checker of my computer tried to escape my computer and set itself on fire.
I think form here on out that if I am going to order a cake, I am going to the bakers with several drawings of what I want, letters and all. After the amount of time I would spend on it and coloring it, they had better return the favor. If not, I guess I'll call my solisitor.

January 27, 2010 | Unregistered Commentershikishinobi

I agree with dustthouart...
Not cake wrecks worthy unless I'm missing something else.
But the other ones definitely good choices. :)

January 27, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterElisabeth Marie

and the "missspellers" or "mistOr spellors" we will haf wit us allways! ~ LOL
Ok, ok, I'm bad ~ Couldn't resist!

January 27, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterCher' Shots

@DocRummel - I'm pretty sure that while Hofstra has a law school, it's also a full-up university.

My eyes are still burning from Wreck #1, though, so I could be completely confused.

January 27, 2010 | Unregistered Commenterbetsey

@dustthouart, right on...

January 27, 2010 | Unregistered Commenterknine22

Because of this blog, I am now seeing quotation marks everywhere, such as the furniture store last weekend, where the sign on the desk said, "To write a "check" you must have a "license" or "I.D"."

I have an "I.D.", (wink wink) so I think I'll just whip out a piece of scrap paper and write out a "check" because that would "fulfill" their "rule".

January 27, 2010 | Unregistered Commenteragibean1958

I had to read the social workor cake about 4 times before I managed to parse it correctly to figure out what it really said.

WF: mangsly - "That's one mangsly looking bunch of cakes!"

January 27, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

TAKS (Texas Assessment of Knowledge & Skills) is the standardized testing used in Texas. It's very similar to the FCAT. Just an FYI.

I've lived, gone to school and taught in both states. :O)

Lynn

January 27, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

"Congratulatiun for doing and Exernplary Jabon TAKS Capitol Letter"

If my theory is correct that this was quoted from a congratulatory letter by the Texas Governor (whose office is in the Capitol), and Governor Rick Perry wrote the letter himself, this is probably EXACTLY how he spelled it: "Congratulatiun for doing and Exernplary Jabon TAKS."

The Guv's intellect is legendary around here.

January 27, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterGary

Looking at the last one, it appears as if the "jabon TAKS" was previously corrected. I see a deep gouge of icing under that section. I can only imagine what they could have messed up and FIXED, and still had such bad results overall!

January 27, 2010 | Unregistered Commenterbuffybakes

As a Hofstra Student, I can say that cake is the equivalent to the actual state of affairs of the Student Government Association, badly spelled and an all around Wreck.

January 27, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

@betsey

Eh, you're probably right. I know about the law school since they sent me lots of pretty ads after they saw my LSAT score. (They weren't quite so interested in my SAT/ACT performance apparently.)

That, and the gavel thing implied "law."

smogin: Law students like me need more than a smogin of humility.

January 27, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterDocRummel

Oh goodness, the last one! It's just even funnier because I work in a Texas public high school. :)

I agree with whoever said they should use this cake for the kids who didn't pass.

(Back in my day it was called the TAAS test.)

January 27, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterArc

Hey, did you notice that on the last cake, not only is the writing messy, but "Jawbone" is misspelled?

January 27, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterGary

As the submitter of the Alumni Mentors cake, I'll say that basically the reason that this cake shouldn't have quotation marks, despite being something that a person would be saying, is the same reason I'm not putting quotation marks around my comment right now.

Unless they were trying to convey, through cake, that the people who hosted the reception were quoting somebody who was not present and not the people hosting/attending the reception, then it shouldn't have quotation marks because you don't put quotation marks around your own writing. And if they WERE quoting somebody, being primarily a journalism program, they should have attributed it.

Also, I'm far, far too excited to see my submission on Cake Wrecks. This made my day!

January 27, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterMary R.

shouldn't it be that we're "glad" the "mentors" could "teach"?

January 27, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Wow! A double whammy for me today. I'm a former AU "student" and currently have children bemoaning the existence of the TAKS tests at their "exemplary" school. Ha! I do feel "special".

Sweet!

January 27, 2010 | Unregistered Commenterlisadh

These cakes make me glad I usually just make my own. They may not be professional, but they will ALWAYS be spelled correctly.

January 27, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterJohn and Sarah Sperry

whaa?! and here i sit thinking i was the lone texan of the bunch.

i shall forward the TAKS wreck to my hubby, who is at this very moment, trying to knock some sense into his fourth-graders at a texas public school, in preparation for the upcoming TAKS test.

sadly, the person who inscribed this cake is probably a product of our public school system.

sigh.

January 27, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterTerry Lee

I love the Hofstra cake. I had to show my husband. He got a kick out of it, since he works there!

January 27, 2010 | Unregistered Commenterkatrotta

Rarely is the question asked: is our children learning? :) *shot*

January 27, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

It's too bad the TAKS cake decorator couldn't have saved all of her mistakes for the acronym, since it sounds (from the Texas teacher posters) like pretty much any acronym would have worked.

Liz in Seattle

January 27, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

I am in LOVE with this blog! I am in Nursing school at The University of Alabama and my life gets pretty hectic, but whenever I need a good laugh I always look at this blog! You guys are AMAZING and absolutely HILARIOUS!! Thank you for giving me a good laugh when I need it most!

January 27, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterJayne Ellen

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