Happy(?) Divorce Day!
January 5, 2015 Note: NSFW Naughtiness Ahead. You have been warned!
Oh yeah. And blood.
Like, a surprising amount of blood.
Did I mention the blood?
It's National Divorce Day, my friends, and - oh yes - WE HAVE CAKES FOR THAT.
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"Frying pans - who knew, right?"
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I wrote a dirty joke here, then remembered my parents read this blog. So just let your imagination do the walking, sitting, etc. Also, HI MOM & DAD!
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Thanks for censoring that, John.
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Uh, I think I'm sensing a trend here, ladies...
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OH THAT'S JUST NOT RIGHT.
And remember, girls, sometimes a divorce cake can backfire. Like when Lindsy's friends ordered one with a swimming fish that read, "She finally got away!"
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OOPSIE.
Thanks to Greg F., Anony M., Tori L., Jennifer S., Katherine, Laura K., Emily R., & Lindsy F. for the bait and switch.
*****
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Reader Comments (75)
Aidan:
"... Isn't the horrible subject matter precisely what makes the cakes worthy of being called wrecks?..."
Well, sure. Personally, I tried to make it clear that my criticisms were directed at the people who ordered and/or made these things. Not at our hosts for putting up pictures of them. At no point did I say that they were an inappropriate subject for a blog devoted to outbreaks of ineptitude or poor taste.
After going through a bitter divorce of my own, I wish I'd thought of a few of these to order at the time. Too funny!
I nearly died laughing seeing the censored rocket ship lmao. The rest of these cakes are pretty scary. Sheesh and Halloween is months away. Early practice I guess.
I have 2 men friends who were physically abused by their wives. I "shared" cake #2 with them. I know they'll agree with the sentiment-both are glad to be out of their marriages. We would have celebrated with cake if we had thought of it sooner!
I've seen precious few people here who are okay with cutting a cake that just happens to be shaped like a baby, so I for one am very glad to see this much opposition to these one-sidedly violent cakes.
Jen, maybe you just couldn't find even one bloody cake from the man's point of view because bakers are too afraid to make them because the image isn't PC enough? Dismember a man on a cake and laugh your head off, dismember a woman on a cake and you're Hitler's evil twin?? I don't think so, folks!!!
Sauce for the goose, sauce for the gander, sauce for the gosling...
Loved them. Still married here.. some days happily and some days less so but I've supported enough friends who've been through hell with ex's and smiled for the sake of their children I appreciate the opportunity for a little .. ahem ... gallows humor.
And just an aside .. while I've known a couple of guys who'd happily enjoy a beheading cake upon separating from their partners, the vast majority of folks who'd order a cake in celebration of the event are women. Hence the rather gendered pov.
That there's even a such thing as a National Divorce Day is hella depressing.
Also, methinks you may have angered the natives... some folks here are REALLY overreacting to the cakes, lol. I don't think they understand the concept of tongue-in-cheek humor the way some of us do. @Mimsie: it's a joke, dear... not an actual endorsement of spousal abuse. Unbunch your panties, mmmkay
Of course all these cakes are meant for women. Any guys out there with a (male) friend who went through a bad divorce? Did you go out and buy him a special cake to cheer him up? Really? Anyone?
Bea:
"Dismember a man on a cake and laugh your head off, dismember a woman on a cake and you're Hitler's evil twin??..."
Well, men still have classic culture like Robert Crumb's comics and a kajillion posters from slasher movies, if they get the urge to use that sort of thing for cathartic or comedic purposes. As with some of these cakes, some viewers can appreciate the technical skills of the creators but still say, "Uh... feelin' kind of nauseous here."
I served the cake with the headless groom and the blood running down it. I was a pastry chef at a very high end restaurant, and someone brought it in for a party. All the male staff in the kitchen were horrified!
Sheesh, I thought these cakes were all hysterical. I guess I'm a sicko. But then I loved Arsenic and Old Lace.....
I just love when people talk shit about the humor... People really! No one is forcing you to look at the site.
I guess violence is always funny when men are the targets and women the perps.
Thanks for the memo.
SMH
Where does one get that "bride feeding screaming groom into a woodchipper" caketopper?
Can you imagine the screams and shouts if these acts of violence were perpetrated by men instead of women? The double standard is sickening and so are these cakes.
Wow...I am disturbed... These are so full of hate.
It makes you wonder why people like this get married in the first place! And, I know, sometimes divorce does happen, but... to "celebrate" it? Isn't it kind of a sad occasion? And celebrating with a gory, violent, hateful cake? Strange....
Sorry, I think that these are hysterically funny. I mean, isn't it better to put the hate on the Wreck, than a knife in the neck? And possibly, folks would be up in arms if the gender roles were reversed, but part of what's gone to hell in the US, at least (and, apparently, in France) is a ridiculous amount of political correctness that overwhelms common sense. It's not like anyone is going to look at the wood-chipper cake and think, "oh, gosh, THERE ya go, ehh--the solution to my issues with Ricky!"
It's humor. It's dark. I'll bet you $5.00 that half of the people who were offended are regular watchers of Game of Thrones or Sons of Anarchy, or watched Boardwalk Empire or The Sopranos. Now, that's some violence. The cakes? Very, very dark humor. (And hilarious). How can these be more offensive than the weirdo blue baby Red Velvet cake? Or remember that PIG? Sheesh!
I'd still have a slice...someone pass the fork!
I have a dark sense of humor, so for those who have had horrible marriage experiences, I'd say it's better to say it with cake. And, yes, I would say it should go both ways. Is it necessary for humor, even dark humor, to have a double standard? But let's be honest here: no man's "bestie" will order a cake for him when he unloads his horrible, shrew of a wife to make him feel better or laugh. He'll take him out for a drink or 20.
Yup, NOT FUNNY.
Sorry folks, but funny is funny! Shocking?...yes....horrific at times?.... No more so than bloody birthing babies. Married 25 years and went through my husband's first divorce where he was totally raked over the coals, but even he was grinning at the creativity of these. Guess our sense of humor is not the norm, but glad you posted these!
A big "Yes!" to all these cakes.I guess all the people who hated on these cakes, have never been married to someone who made them feel like doing some of these things - and I am happy for those fortunate sou;s. If you get a cake like this made, you probably had good reason to have dreams like these. I hope having these cakes at their "divorce party" got this stuff out of their system and let them move on to the rest of their lives. Happy day!
Hi CV,
I agree with your comments, except for one thing. In real life it is largely the men who are putting the women in the shredder and beating women with base ball bats. Domestic violence is rife and women are usually the victims and get murdered in large numbers as a result. In my small town, a man was recently convicted of beating his wife to death, then dissolving her body in a barrel of acid. Far better that women are acting out the fantasy of violence with cake, distasteful as the cakes may end up looking, than actually committing violent crimes. I think it's a kind of therapy for them that allows them to move on with life. I'm not suggesting that all divorces are the result of domestic violence, or that the women who ordered these cakes were victims of it. I just think there is a big difference in the way that men and women express extreme anger.
Apart from the question "is it funny or not?" Am I the only one who is just flabbergasted about all those toppers they make especially for this? I mean, seriously??? The beheaded guys, the grinder? whawhawhat?
(but cutting of the head of the groomtopper seems like fun :-) )
I love the "Fargo" one: # 8 😂