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What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen
Tuesday
May182010

Hungry Like a Wolf

I don't take many requests here on CW, but when Katie P. asked for werewolf Wrecks in honor of her friend's new all-girl werewolf book, I was intrigued. Haven't I always said there's a cake for everything? And besides, coming off of Sunday's literary sweets, this seems appropriate.

SO. Werewolf cakes. Right. This should be interesting.

Here we have the elusive half wolf, half cake breed:

Now, you might think that a cake sprouting a wolf head would look odd. That's where the pine sprigs come in.

Ever heard of Hover Cat? Well, here's hover wolf:

Or possibly centipede wolf. I'm not sure.

Whichever it is, here he is mid-transformation:

[maintaining a straight face (which is more than I can say for Mr. Weepy Pee here)]

Um, I get the feeling you're not buying this. That perhaps your confidence in my werewolf wreck-spotting ability is slipping.

Well, look, you can tell this next one's a wolf by the teeny little bone in front of him:

That's clearly the femur from some poor soul torn asunder by this hell hound human hybrid!

Ignore the weird ripply ear-or-possibly-wing-like things. It's a hell hound. Trust me.

Or, if you won't take my word for it, take a Canadian magazine's:

You know you can trust Canadians, right? And they claim this is a werewolf. I like his little 80's exercise headband and how his ears sprout from the side of his jaw.

Hey, Katie P., Sarah F., Alexander B., & Renee T., do your ears hang low?

Katie, I hope I've done your friend and her book proud. And for the rest of you, if you're tired of hunky guy werewolf books, give Claire de Lune a try.

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Reader Comments (92)

Spook-y, scar-y!

May 18, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterClaire

wow, those are awful. Awfully darn funny.

May 18, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterMary

The last one is a lifelike representation of Chewbacca...IMHO..and I AM Canadian...

May 18, 2010 | Unregistered Commentermizdarlin

Wow, let's have a little cake with our frosting!

May 18, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

I think the last one looks like Epcot.

May 18, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Are you sure it isn't a werechewbaccawolf?

May 18, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterVĂ©dis

The first cake looks all scabby- makes me want to permanently swear off cake. And I think the last one looks like Harry from Harry and the Hendersons.

May 18, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterCorri Anne

Looking that the first one, I thought, "Oh. Well that's a little unfortunate, but not all that bad." Little did I know about the parade of Wookie Poo that followed. Thanks for the nightmares!

May 18, 2010 | Unregistered Commenterthisamericantourist

LOL, Weepy Pee.... That made my day. :)

May 18, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterClementine

@Claire...

Awesome 30Rock reference.

"Werewolf Bar Mitzvah... Spook-y Scar-y. Boys becoming men. Men becoming wolves!"

May 18, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterT

Is it just me, or does the first one look like it might be a wedding cake? Creepy.

May 18, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterHeather

I keep telling myself, do NOT read Cake Wrecks at work, do NOT! It is getting increasingly more and more difficult to conceal my outburst of laughter!!

May 18, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterConnie Moreno

I love how these little dog-ish creatures are a recurrent figure, but in varying forms. I've never seen any of these in the bakeries around me *phew*, hopefully we're not on that level, yet

May 18, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterSavvy

the last one looks like it was meant to be bigfoot, but then they changed their minds half way :P

May 18, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterLogan the Awesome

While I was looking at this post, my daughter looked up and said, in a very small, scared voice, "I don't like that one." She meant the pink one in particular, but when she saw the rest, she asked me to close the page!

May 18, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAmnesty

I am Canadian. I am an amateur baker and magazine reader. Never in my life have I seen something so unintentionally disturbing, strange, and spaghetti icing-ish in an open-to-the-public cooking magazine than the last cake. Lovely, really.

You think the Canadians were going for Teen Wolf? For HIMYM fans:

"Come on Ref! There's a teen wolf on the court!"

If you're taking any more requests, you have already allowed me to freak out my sister with foot cakes, but now I'd love to freak out our mutual friend. She has a weird thing about eyes. Not all eyes, but some pictures of eyes freak her out. We play a game sometimes called "how about this one" where we pull up google image search and try to figure out what about certain eyes freak her out. Imagine that, except with eye cakes and your witty commentary to join our game. Yes? YES?

May 18, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterMarcie

I think the first one is supposed to be a fox. Fox noses are slimmer than wolf snouts.

In honor of my friend Paula I think you should do walrus cakes.

May 18, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAllegra

Well, the Canadian werewolf looks to me like a cross between King Kong and Teen Wolf - with an exercise headband :) . As for the hell hound human hybrid, all that chocolate icing makes my teeth hurt looking at it, and I'm a chocoholic!

WV creasess - There are a large number of creasess on the hell hound human hybrid.

May 18, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

That first one is so creepy. Like taxidermy, or a mafia cake. Eeww

May 18, 2010 | Unregistered Commenterwoof nanny

As a Canadian I can vouch for the fact that all werewolves here model their look after Teen Wolf here.

May 18, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAshley

my 10 yr old daughter declared the "Hell Hound" adorable. Then she asked me if the " Canadian werewolf" was Bigfoot......

May 18, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterKorrie

That first one... why is it on a plain white cake?! The wolf is so well decorated, and he looks rather sweet, but what happened, they ran out of steam??

The second one is kinda cute. Maybe he turned orange in horror of that notion.

The third one... argh! And the fourth-- icing much? As for the last, um, I guess that and the nurses cake prove that we Canadians can wreck cakes with the "best" of them! Wow, a wolf? seriously? I'll never look at Canadian Living magazine the same way again!

May 18, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAliza

I just actually bought that book at B&N the other day. I am looking forward to reading it, but now I am scared of cake. ;)

May 18, 2010 | Unregistered Commenterdesdemona

oh good god. when I saw that first one, I actually screamed.

May 18, 2010 | Unregistered Commenterandygirl

"Bernadette said...

Actually, the pine sprigs on the first wreck look like asparagus fern. Which is, um, toxic. So you can have your wolf and poison people too!"

Erk!
I need to avoid that one then!

I'm allergic to that plant even when it's nowhere near my mouth...

May 18, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterDee

I'm tempted to say that the Canadian Living cake looks much more like a Wookie or a Sasquatch than a werewolf. ... but I guarantee it'll taste good, no matter what it looks like. Those recipes are typically fantastic, and a reason why the magazine keeps going after 35 years of publication.

May 18, 2010 | Unregistered Commenteralison

I'm actually trusting the Canucks more for the "werewolf" part than the "scary" part. It's a plausible werewolf. But, scary?

May 18, 2010 | Unregistered Commenterserns

Looks like someone found bigfoot! That last cake looks like him lol. Does this mean if I bit into one of those werewolf cakes I get to become a cake wreck? I would run off laughing looking at what appears to be melting creatures of some sort in the last three pictures..

May 19, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterArlene

wow...I just look at all that chocolate frosting on the last one....but it would have to be homemade butter-cream with lots of cocoa powder in it....

May 19, 2010 | Unregistered Commentercanngil

The Canadian one looks like a cross between Chewie, the sarlac, and a rancor. I'm trying not to picture how such a creature would come to be.

May 19, 2010 | Unregistered Commenterreniciera

Ummmm Yummmy :P Very Nice Thanks For Sharing http://friendslinks.co.cc" rel="nofollow">Friends Links Forum

May 19, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterMurtuza

The last one... Um. Does he have a butterfly for a nose?

May 19, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAmanda

Oh dear...furry cake head thing.

May 19, 2010 | Unregistered Commenterdietplaid

looks like Chewbaca!

May 19, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterS

This blogsite makes me want to carry my camera into every bakery in town. They just keep getting better - or worse - well they just keep getting. However, I really like the last werewolf.

May 19, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Oh, please! Number three is a Yorkie terrier with a bad henna rinse. So surprised you did not recognize this!

May 19, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

I laugh at Cake Wrecks all the time, but this is the first time a post has literally taken my breath away... LOL, took me a while to find it again when I saw that wolf head :P I think it got stuck on the "oh my god". Thank you, as always, for brightening my day! :)

May 19, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterZoulou

LOL! That issue of Canadian Living magazine has been gathering dust on my coffee table since November 2008! There is also a recipe for making baby werewolf "Cub Cakes," which are actually pretty cute!

May 20, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

I'm surprised that nobody has made the connection on the 2 middle cakes... aren't those "Harry By The Sea", the kids' book about the dog who got covered in seaweed and scared everbody off the beach"?

May 21, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Okay, I know this is old, but I didn't have time to comment when it came out... but didn't anyone else lose it at "Mr. Weepy Pee"? That did me in, and I'm still laughing several days later!

May 21, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterGhost Rider

really Canadian Living? Are you sure that's a werewolf? Or maybe a Sasquatch? Maybe....?

May 24, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnnaBanana

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